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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/27452281">Finding our way back...</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/namuhyuniie/pseuds/tigerpupmoun'>tigerpupmoun (namuhyuniie)</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>SEVENTEEN (Band)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Domestic Fluff, Exes, Fluff, Fluff and Humor, Fluff and Hurt/Comfort, Getting Back Together, Light Angst, M/M, Romantic Fluff, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, ex-lovers, i honestly dont know how to tag, soonwoo, soonwoo stupid but i love them, with bonus</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-11-08</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-11-08</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-06 16:28:28</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>23,481</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/27452281</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/namuhyuniie/pseuds/tigerpupmoun</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>"𝘈𝘵 𝘭𝘦𝘢𝘴𝘵 𝘵𝘦𝘭𝘭 𝘮𝘦 𝘸𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘐 𝘥𝘪𝘥 𝘸𝘳𝘰𝘯𝘨 𝘚𝘰𝘰𝘯𝘪𝘦 𝘴𝘰 𝘐 𝘤𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥 𝘧𝘪𝘹 𝘪𝘵. 𝘠𝘰𝘶 𝘤𝘢𝘯'𝘵 𝘫𝘶𝘴𝘵... 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘤𝘢𝘯'𝘵 𝘫𝘶𝘴𝘵 𝘦𝘯𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨𝘴 𝘭𝘪𝘬𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴" 𝘞𝘰𝘯𝘸𝘰𝘰 𝘮𝘶𝘮𝘣𝘭𝘦𝘴 𝘥𝘦𝘴𝘱𝘦𝘳𝘢𝘵𝘦𝘭𝘺 </p><p>"𝘐'𝘮 𝘴𝘰𝘳𝘳𝘺" 𝘚𝘰𝘰𝘯𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘯𝘨 𝘴𝘢𝘺𝘴 𝘧𝘪𝘯𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘺, 𝘷𝘰𝘪𝘤𝘦 𝘴𝘮𝘢𝘭𝘭 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘷𝘶𝘭𝘯𝘦𝘳𝘢𝘣𝘭𝘦, 𝘢𝘴 𝘩𝘦 𝘨𝘳𝘢𝘣𝘴 𝘞𝘰𝘯𝘸𝘰𝘰'𝘴 𝘢𝘳𝘮𝘴 𝘰𝘯 𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘴𝘩𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥𝘦𝘳𝘴 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘥𝘳𝘰𝘱 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘮 𝘤𝘢𝘳𝘦𝘧𝘶𝘭𝘭𝘺 𝘰𝘯 𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘴𝘪𝘥𝘦. 𝘞𝘪𝘵𝘩 𝘰𝘯𝘦 𝘭𝘢𝘴𝘵 𝘭𝘰𝘰𝘬 𝘢𝘵 𝘞𝘰𝘯𝘸𝘰𝘰'𝘴 𝘧𝘢𝘤𝘦 𝘩𝘦 𝘵𝘶𝘳𝘯𝘴 𝘢𝘳𝘰𝘶𝘯𝘥 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘸𝘢𝘭𝘬𝘴 𝘢𝘸𝘢𝘺, 𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘮𝘪𝘴𝘴𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘵𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘴 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘦𝘴𝘤𝘢𝘱𝘦 𝘞𝘰𝘯𝘸𝘰𝘰'𝘴 𝘦𝘺𝘦𝘴 𝘮𝘢𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘩𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘵 𝘣𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘬 𝘣𝘦𝘺𝘰𝘯𝘥 𝘳𝘦𝘱𝘢𝘪𝘳. </p><p>'𝘛𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘪𝘴 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘣𝘦𝘴𝘵' 𝘸𝘢𝘴 𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘭𝘢𝘴𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘰𝘶𝘨𝘩𝘵 𝘣𝘦𝘧𝘰𝘳𝘦 𝘩𝘦 𝘧𝘭𝘢𝘨𝘨𝘦𝘥 𝘥𝘰𝘸𝘯 𝘢 𝘵𝘢𝘹𝘪 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘸𝘦𝘯𝘵 𝘩𝘰𝘮𝘦 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩𝘰𝘶𝘵 𝘭𝘰𝘰𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘣𝘢𝘤𝘬 𝘢𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘦 𝘰𝘧 𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘭𝘪𝘧𝘦 𝘸𝘩𝘰 𝘩𝘦 𝘩𝘢𝘥 𝘫𝘶𝘴𝘵 𝘭𝘰𝘴𝘵. 𝘍𝘰𝘳𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Boo Seungkwan/Chwe Hansol | Vernon, Choi Seungcheol | S.Coups/Yoon Jeonghan, Jeon Wonwoo/Kwon Soonyoung | Hoshi, Kim Mingyu/Xu Ming Hao | The8</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>46</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Finding our way back...</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Hello! This is the first time I've written a fic with SoonWoo as the main ship and I hope all of you will like it. I really love SoonWoo so much like really really love them and they just make me really happy these days. Anyway this wasn't beta-ed and English is not my first language but I really hope you guys would like this. Enjooooy &lt;3</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p> </p><p>
  <em>"</em>
  <em>W-What?" Soonyoung heard Wonwoo mumbled, confused if he heard the older right </em>
</p><p>
  <em>Soonyoung tried his best to control his emotions and appear confident in front of Wonwoo who was breaking down as much as he probably was, inside. He casts his eyes downward, unable to look back at Wonwoo's intense eyes, and sees the other's hand tightly wrapped around his wrist as if he doesn't wanna let go. Soonyoung blinks his eyes..one... two... three... until his vision clears from the threatening tears to spill. He takes in a deep breath, not forgetting to glance at Wonwoo's hand still holding him. One last time. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>He mustered all the courage he could get out from his system before finally for the first time that night, he looks directly back at Wonwoo and he knows he succeeded in masking his true feelings if the younger's hurtful expression was any indication. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>"I'm tired Wonwoo. I'm not happy with you anymore. I'm sorry" Soonyoung wanted to pat himself for sounding so honest when every single word he had uttered were all lies. If it were any other day, he would have called Seokmin and brag about his acting skills. There's nothing to brag about right now though. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>Wonwoo stares back at him for a good minute or two trying to find something in Soonyoung's eyes, Soonyoung knows that whatever it is he's looking for, he would never find it. Soonyoung would never let him. Not now. Not ever. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>Slowly, Soonyoung feels his heart break apart even more than it already has as he feels Wonwoo's grasp on him slowly loosening. He's losing him and as much as he doesn't want to he can't take it back. He shouldn't. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>"Is that what you really want?" Wonwoo whispered, tone neutral </em>
</p><p>
  <em>If Soonyoung didn't know him like the back of his hand he would have thought Wonwoo was okay. That Wonwoo didn't care. He was always mistaken to be a cold and snobby person but Soonyoung knows better. Knowing him for almost a decade and being in love with him for half of that time, he knows Wonwoo's hurting inside. As much as he was. And he was the cause of it. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>Funny how his mind keeps replaying that day where both of them promised, complete with cheap plastic rings and pinky swears and snots and tears, that they would always, always be by each other's side. That they would never leave each other. Ever. He promised Wonwoo, he gave him his most sacred pinky swear yet here he was, doing exactly the opposite of that. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>"I'm sorry" is the only thing he could say as he avoids Wonwoo's gaze on him again. He can't take the strong and intense look anymore. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>Soonyoung is scared he'd tell Wonwoo it was all a joke, Wonwoo would sulk but they'd both laugh at it in the end then kiss and hug each other, like always. But he can't. As much as he wants to. He can't be that selfish. Not with Wonwoo. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>So he stayed grounded on the floor, eyes everywhere but the man in front of him and tries to calm and control himself. He can do this. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>"I don't need your apology Kwon Soonyoung. I fucking need some answers" Wonwoo yelled at him and he sees from his peripheral view how the younger messes up his hair and rubs his face, irritated and frustrated. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>If it was a normal day he'd come closer to Wonwoo hug his waist with his left arm, then lifts up his right hand to tame down the other's wild locks. He'd cling to him like a koala even if Wonwoo tries to push him away lightly and buries his face on the crook of Wonwoo's neck mumbling soothing words that he knows Wonwoo needs whenever he's upset about something. He'd pepper his neck with soft kisses and waits for Wonwoo to wrap his arms around him and places a light peck on top of his head then he'd smile and move away just to look at the man towering over him, now wearing the most genuine smile and he knows by then Wonwoo is okay. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>A few moments have passed with them not saying anything. The weight and tension around them becomes more and more heavy that Soonyoung feels suffocated. He wanted to end this. He wanted to go home, lock himself inside his bedroom, bury himself on his blankets and let out all the tears and screams that he's trying hard to fight right now. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>"At least tell me what I did wrong Soonie so I could fix it. You can't just... you can't just end things like this" Wonwoo mumbles desperately as he takes a step closer to Soonyoung grabbing both of his shoulders so they could look at each other. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>As if Wonwoo had put a spell on him, he moves his head up and looks at him which he realized was a bad idea seeing how glassy and hurt Wonwoo's eyes were. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>'Shit' Soonyoung thinks. He needs to get out of here or he might do something stupid </em>
</p><p>
  <em>"I'm sorry" Soonyoung says finally, voice small and vulnerable, as he grabs Wonwoo's arms on his shoulders and drop them carefully on his side. With one last look at Wonwoo's face he turns around and walks away, not missing the tears that escape Wonwoo's eyes making his heart break beyond repair. </em>
</p><p><em>'This is for the best' was his last thought before he flagged down a taxi and went home without looking back at the love of his life who he had just lost. Forever</em>.</p><p> </p><p>💎💎💎</p><p> </p><p>Soonyoung sniffles as fragments of his dream slowly fades away. It was a normal thing though; he had been dreaming about <em>that night</em> from time to time since it happened<em>. </em>Yes, it wasn't just a dream, it was a memory that had been taunting him for making the worst decision of his life. He sighs wiping his tears away and was about to go back to sleep when he hears his phone rings, he groans at the sound of it ringing loudly and buries his face on his soft pillow damping it with his wet cheeks. He tries his best to ignore whoever it was that calling him at an ungodly hour.</p><p>'Maybe they'd stop calling if I don't answer them' he thinks</p><p>Contrary to what he was hoping, his phone kept ringing which was really really really annoying so he didn't have a choice seeing that he wouldn't be able to go back to sleep anyway with the incessant noise.</p><p>He grabs his phone with an annoyed grunt from his bedside table and glares at the name of the devil that disturbed him from his beauty sleep.</p><p>"This better be worth disturbing my most precious beauty sleep Lee Chan" Soonyoung grumbles on his phone and even if he doesn't see it he knows Chan was rolling his eyes</p><p>"First of all hyung why are you still sleeping? It's almost 2pm you old bum. Second, I would just like to remind you of Gyu and Hao hyungs' engagement party at 5pm tonight. Lastly, Seokmin hyung and I are on our way to your apartment because you told us you wanted to go there together FYI so you better get up and take that smelly ass of yours in the shower" Chan says on the phone and he could hear a faint giggle in the background. Must be Seokmin laughing.</p><p>"That was today? I thought it was supposed to be next week" he yawns staring blankly at his ceiling</p><p>Of course he remembers it. He might forget a few things but he'd never forget anything special about his beloved friends especially celebrating how two of his bestest friends are finally engaged after being together for so many years. He smiles, not quite reaching his eyes, as he remembers a certain person he's sure as hell he would never forget. He blames it on <em>that dream.</em></p><p>"You and your forgetful mind. This is why I told you to tone down your work hours hyung. You've been straining yourself too much for the past few weeks" Seokmin worriedly reminds him</p><p>"Dokyeom-ah I just got promoted. Of course I would want to impress my superiors" he replies before he gets up from his bed and tucks his phone between his ears and shoulder to fix his bed</p><p>"Still, you shouldn't overwork yourself hyung" Seokmin insists and he smiles, his dongsaeng was really an angel but he could be such a worrywart sometimes.</p><p>They talk some more wherein his two dongsaengs just nag at him endlessly before he tells them he'd take a shower so that when they arrive they could leave right away. The three of them decided to go on a drive thru just so Soonyoung can put something in his stomach since he hadn't eaten anything yet.</p><p>Just like Minghao and Mingyu's plan, their engagement party was just a small gathering for both of their families and friends. They rented out a fancy French restaurant for dinner where they had both met each other in high school as part time workers. Soonyoung had always loved their story ever since the first time he had heard of it from Minghao during college maybe because he had the same story, the difference though was Minghao wasn't stupid like him.</p><p>💎💎💎</p><p>A few weeks after the engagement party, Soonyoung finds himself seated on the love seat at Seungkwan and Vernon's living room surrounded by lots and lots of magazines and a few packages. They all have decided to help Minghao on looking for the best suits for him and his fiancé on the wedding except for Chan who was out of town to check the site of his on-going project and Seungcheol who had an emergency meeting.</p><p>The engaged couple have chosen a summer wedding at the beach since their initial choice which was a winter wedding was too close and Minghao would never let his wedding be crammed plus they both are suckers for beach views and just beach in general anyway.</p><p>Soonyoung remembers that time when Mingyu had declared that if Minghao wanted to live in a beach house in the future he'd built one for them even if it takes him five or ten years to do so. Soonyoung even jived in saying that he’d be the couple’s landlord. Dumb but whipped, was what most of them told Mingyu and the others who didn't respond just threw a pillow at him. Mingyu loves Myungho that much.</p><p>"What are these?" Soonyoung asks pointing at the small boxes on the ground beside the table. He reaches for one and examines the box</p><p>"Can't you see that they are boxes hyung? Duuh!" Seungkwan the ever so sarcastic person in their group deadpans. Soonyoung rolls his eyes at the comment the other just said</p><p>"I know what they are smartass I'm talking about what's inside of them" Soonyoung retorts with a pout</p><p>"You should've asked what's inside not what they are then" Seungkwan says with a teasing smirk</p><p>"Why are you being mean to me again? Yah! It's not my fault Vernon didn't put his dick in your ass last night so don't take it out on me" Soonyoung teases which managed to make the other blush a crimson red</p><p>"Shut up!" Seungkwan throws a pillow on his face which made him smile. His younger friend is really cute like that.</p><p>"Naaah he's being mean because his ass hurts too much. I had my cock inside it until 4am this morning. Sorry hyung, my fault" Vernon announced teasingly as he comes back from the kitchen holding 2 big bowls of fries he and Joshua just finished cooking. Joshua trails behind him with a tray of canned ciders and bowl of ice.</p><p>"What the fuck! TMI! Can we please avoid talking about anyone's sex life here because I don't care" Jihoon, ever so grumpy, exclaimed dramatically which made all of them laugh.</p><p>"I think those are the invitations. Mingyu and I went to the printing shop a week ago and they were delivered this morning. I haven't checked them yet though. Can you pass one box to me hyung?" Minghao who was sitting on the floor across him asks and he gladly gave the box he was holding.</p><p>"A week? You managed to get them in a week? How come I had to wait at least three weeks for my own damn wedding invitations. I would never forget how I was this close to calling Shua so I could sue that printing shop three years ago and I would have really, if only Cheol didn't stop me" Jeonghan from the other side of the room comments as he munches on a few fries in his hand</p><p>"Yup, Mingyu's sister knows this printing shop which had high quality, cheap price and fast delivery. I think the owner is her college friend if I’m not mistaken" Minghao explains opening the box Soonyoung had given him</p><p>"Oh wow! It looks great. Simple but elegant. I love it" Joshua says as he takes one and inspects it</p><p>"Woah, it's much better in person. Okay whoever designed this is a real intellect" Seokmin excitedly says from his seat beside Myungho turning to everyone with a proud smile and fingers pointing at himself</p><p>"Yeah, yeah everyone knows you're the genius here when it comes to designing things Mr. The-Best-Artist-In-Town" Minghao says rubbing Seokmin's head affectionately</p><p>They all continue to talk about random things as they give their own opinions about which suit would best fit both grooms. But really when it comes to fashion Minghao was the best for it as he had the best taste in clothes. Minghao told them they were still canvassing for the food they'd have on the wedding and will let them know if he needs help for the food tasting. Mingyu works as a producer in a broadcasting company and he had an on-going drama production so he couldn't help much on the preparation but he does his best in doing anything he could, after all it's his wedding with the love of his life. It has to be special and well prepared for. Minghao, on the other hand works as a freelance photographer which makes his schedule more flexible than his fiancé.</p><p>Soonyoung looks around at his friends who he had met in college and how even after all these years they still stick by each other's side. Though they all have their own paths to take, they know that whatever happens they've always got each other's back. Always.</p><p>Junhui was talking about how he got invited to speak at a conference for medical students in Yonsei University by his former professor next month and how he was thinking of ways he could make it more interesting and not boring which Seokmin jokingly answer that he should dance in front of them making the others laugh, <em>when he sees it</em>. Soonyoung sees the name on one of the invitations now spread out on the coffee table. He wasn't holding it; it was just there lying on the table as if jeering at him with just those small but bold letters. He sees it, looks at it intently and reads it over and over again. <em>Jeon Wonwoo.</em></p><p>He feels his traitorous heart thump inside his chest slowly at first but then speeds up as the realization hit him. It's just a name on an invitation yet it still makes his head spin, his heart speeds up and stop all at once. Funny how a name could have this much impact on him but then again it's <em>his</em> name so Soonyoung should really not be surprised anymore.</p><p>Jeonghan had always have what people refer to as motherly instinct especially when it comes to Soonyoung. Even when they were in college the older always senses when things are not going well for him. He had always been the second one to figure Soonyoung out. Second because no one could beat <em>him</em> on knowing Soonyoung like the back of <em>his</em> hand, or at least that was how things were <em>before</em>. And just like when they were in college, Jeonghan still could see through him that when he asked if Soonyoung was okay and the younger said yes. Jeonghan knew he was lying.</p><p>So he quite expected he wouldn't be going home alone tonight not when Jeonghan and Seokmin were so insistent on having a sleepover because according to Jeonghan they hadn't done that in a while since they were all pretty busy. Soonyoung had even ask Seungcheol to stop his husband from acting like a spoiled brat but Seungcheol just giggled on the phone, oblivious of Soonyoung's desperate pleads. In the end he couldn't say no, especially when the two idiots have presented him their cutest puppy eyes.</p><p>"You know both of you are so worked up about this when I keep telling you I’m fine" Soonyoung says when they were lying in the makeshift fort they made on his living room earlier as they watch a movie on Netflix. Jeonghan had asked his husband to bring his projector and white screen, they were wedding gifts from Mingyu and Minghao three years ago, at Soonyoung's apartment so they could watch a movie properly. It wasn't a hassle since Soonyoung lives just a few blocks away from them.</p><p>"It's not like he's not allowed to come to the wedding. He's Myungho and Mingyu's friend too especially Mingyu. Besides is he even coming? He missed out your wedding three years ago not to mention Vernon and Seungkwan's wedding last year. Who's to say he won't miss this one?" Soonyoung says sadly, as he thinks about maybe, maybe he's the reason Wonwoo missed out on their friends' weddings. He doesn't wanna assume and think about it but he knows at the back of his mind Wonwoo hates him.</p><p>"Well what if I told you he would come?" Seokmin asks from his right, a little cautious</p><p>He snaps his head in surprise, Seokmin never lies so if he says <em>he's coming</em> then <em>he</em> most probably will.</p><p>"He is? Cheol didn't tell me anything" Jeonghan asks what he had in mind instead</p><p>"Well, you know Mingyu can be really persuasive when he wants to and well honestly Wonwoo hyung didn't need much persuasion in the first place. He had been planning on going back here this year since it's the last year of his residency in London. I mean you didn't think he would stay there forever right? And he told me he already had a job here. Apparently, he's a very in demand doctor in London which makes him the most wanted doctor here. He was bragging about it on the ph--" Seokmin pauses as he notices Soonyoung's blank look and Jeonghan giving him a worried look</p><p>"You talk to him" Soonyoung asks but it sounded more of a statement than a question</p><p>"Yes? Wait hyung, don't hate me okay. I didn't tell you because I know how much talking about Wonwoo hyung makes you sad and I didn't wa--"</p><p>"Why would I get mad at you? I'm not mad. I just... I thought he had only been talking to Cheol hyung since he left" Soonyoung explains.</p><p>'Maybe he talks to everyone but me. Why would he talk to me anyway when he hates me' Soonyoung thinks sadly</p><p>"So when is he coming? Did he tell you?" Jeonghan asks after a few minutes of silence</p><p>"He told me he's not sure when exactly but in three months at most. He is still sorting out his papers there so he can transfer at a hospital here" Seokmin answers, eyes glued to Soonyoung watching his expression</p><p>“Hoshi-ya are you okay?” Jeonghan asks after a moment of silence passed by. He and Seokmin shared a look, Seokmin shrugs before they both look at Soonyoung with worried expression. Soonyoung had sat up with his legs laid out straightly, back against the couch as he hugs a pillow to his chest. He lifts up his head to look at his two friends sitting on either side of his legs facing him. He smiles, a sad one.</p><p>“I’m fine, just shock. But I’m fine… I think. I mean it’s been five years so I should be, right? I should be okay” Soonyoung asks, and even in his own ears it sounded unsure.</p><p>“Hyung? not to be that person but don’t you think it would be better to tell Wonwoo hyung the real reason you broke up with him? I mean he deserves to know right and maybe both of you can I don’t know start over?” Seokmin questions which made Soonyoung scoff bitterly</p><p>“As if it would change anything. Whether he knows or not, it won’t change the fact that I broke my promise to him and I had hurt him. I won’t even blame him if he doesn’t talk to me or act like I don’t exist completely when he comes home and stays here for good. I deserve it anyway” Soonyoung wallows pessimistically</p><p>“Come on Soonyoung-ah you have to give Wonwoo more credit than that. You’ve known him long enough; do you really think he’d act that way?” Jeonghan defends</p><p>“Trust me hyung I know. He hates me more than anything and he would never forgive me” Soonyoung smiled sadly and feels a tear escapes his eye.</p><p>‘Saying that out loud makes it more true and it still hurts… a lot’ is the last thought he had that night before he drifted off to sleep.</p><p>The universe must hate him because that same night, he dreamt about the first time he met Wonwoo and how he made that promise to him. Now, it was just a memory and a broken promise.</p><p>💎💎💎</p><p>Weeks passed by in a blur and without Soonyoung noticing, it had been almost three months since Mingyu and Minghao’s engagement party. They were almost at the end of Winter season having to deal with thick fluffy streams of snow on the road is over but the cold temperature remains to drop a little more every night which Soonyoung wanted to curse out loud. He had been nursing a cold for three days now and he hates how runny and red his nose is. Those medicines in the advertisements don’t work and he should really sue them for taking his money without curing him.</p><p>“Hey there Rudolph, did Santa leave you behind because you were naughty?” Jihoon teased him as soon as he gets inside his car. He hears Chan and Seungkwan snickering from the backseat and turns his body around after putting his seatbelt on just to glare and give them a piece of his mind.</p><p>“You guys have a problem?” he jokingly snaps at his two younger friends</p><p>“No hyung. You look really cute today, like a hamster. A small fluffy hamster” Seungkwan teases just because he knows that could somehow irritate his hyung more</p><p>“Yah! Didn’t we already establish a rule not to compare me to a lowlife rat?" He exclaims glaring at Seungkwan</p><p>"I prefer to be called a tiger okay. Horanghae” Soonyoung adds cutely, curling his fingers and lifting it beside his face as if it would make him look like a real tiger.</p><p>“Stop acting like that. You’re not a hamster nor a tiger genius. You’re a human being so shut up. Besides those cute animals would feel insulted to be compared to you” Jihoon says dragging Soonyoung’s hand down before he starts his car.</p><p>Soonyoung was ready to argue about that but his stupid nose had other plans, for example sneezing loudly, which earned an exasperated ‘Eww’ from both Seungkwan and Chan at the back.</p><p>He giggles before he takes a tissue from his pocket and blows his nose.</p><p>“God! Why did I let you in my car again? I should’ve ditched you instead and let you walk on your own. Yah! If I see even a single spot of snot anywhere here in my car I'm gonna throw you away” Jihoon exclaims looking at him with a disgusted expression</p><p>“We both know you could never do that to me Woozi-ya. No one can. I'm too cute to be thrown away” Soonyoung says with a big grin and crinkling eyes to annoy Jihoon more. Jihoon rolls his eyes and turns his attention back to the road again</p><p>“Yah! Seungkwan-ah why didn’t you go with Vernon by the way? Where is he?” Soonyoung asks after putting his used tissue on a plastic he had in his coat’s pocket.</p><p>He lifts his head to look at Seungkwan at the rear view mirror and both he and Chan had this look on their faces. He raised his eyebrows at them which made Seungkwan sigh before he speaks up.</p><p>“Well you know how bad Seokmin hyung is with directions right? And uhm Wonwoo hyung isn’t familiar with the place yet so… Vernon’s going with them” Seungkwan says biting his lip hesitantly. It was quiet for a few seconds before Soonyoung speaks up again.</p><p>“Oh. Right I forgot Seokmin told me about it” he fakes a laugh and he feels three pairs of worried gazes on him. He smiles at them just to assure that he’s fine.</p><p>Nobody really knows from their group of friends what happened to Soonyoung and Wonwoo because whenever any of them asked him he just gives them a small smile as if telling them he didn't want to talk about it. Except for Seokmin and Jeonghan though, he can never keep anything from those two.</p><p>Somehow, his friends got tired of asking him and there was an unspoken rule of not mentioning Wonwoo's name when Soonyoung was present for the past five years since it made the atmosphere really awkward for how Soonyoung always gets stiff whenever the younger's name gets mentioned. Soonyoung can't help it, even after all these years the guilt and longing still makes his stomach churn and his heart aches a little.</p><p>He knows Wonwoo is back a week ago. He heard it from Seokmin but he quickly forgot about it when he had too many things in mind about work. Being promoted as a Head Marketing Manager has a really great pay but nothing comes for free, as they say. He had been working a lot even on weekends, his work hours on weekdays extended as well. He doesn’t remember what facial expression he gave Seokmin when he had told him how the younger went to pick Wonwoo up at the airport since Seungcheol was busy with work but he knows it didn’t probably look that good which made Seokmin think it was not a good idea to bring it up again.</p><p>Honestly, he had tried to come up with possible reasons not to go to this party but nothing seemed acceptable enough to not be suspicious. He only wishes not to have to deal with this mixed amount of emotions right now though when his nose is shitting him and his head pounding. He is not yet ready and he doesn't know when he's gonna be but he most certainly would not want to deal with Joshua's wraths on not attending his 30th birthday tonight. He just have to suck it up. Soonyoung internally sighs. The mere thought of it already exhausts him physically, mentally and emotionally. If only he could lie on his bed and just sleep he'd be most thankful.</p><p>Later, when the four of them arrives, Joshua, Mingyu and Myungho were the only ones there yet. Joshua reserved a whole room in a barbecue place where they would have dinner and casual drinks. Joshua knew his friends were loud enough to possibly annoy other customers when they were sober and could get a hundred times worse when they get drunk. Better safe than regret it later.</p><p>They didn't have to wait that long before Junhui arrived with a three-layered cake that he and Vernon pre-ordered 2 days ago for this occasion followed a bit later by Cheol and Jeonghan who was holding a large tripod that Minghao asked him to bring. Minghao forgot his earlier because Mingyu was being such a big baby throwing a tantrum on him so he called his hyung and ask if he could bring his instead. Jeonghan was still at home waiting for Cheol to come back from work when he received the call.</p><p>They started talking about random things that is mostly initiated by either Seungkwan or Chan. On normal days he'd be the one to hype everyone up with cracked up stories and whatnot but today he engages himself with the talks however it was not as enthusiastic as he normally would. The bundle of nerves still creeping up on his skin and does not seem to go away. He doesn't want anyone questioning him though so he makes sure he's not suspicious enough. When Junhui asks him if he was okay he just blamed it on his runny nose and mild headache which thankfully the other immediately believe. He didn't exactly lie since he was really feeling shitty today because of his fucked up cold but he can't really tell Junhui that the main reason he's being fidgety is because he's nervous about meeting his ex whom he's still in love with. He'd rather shut up than humiliate himself thank you very much.</p><p>Joshua was telling about a funny episode he had encountered with his recent client in his law firm when the door to their private room opened and suddenly Seokmin's head was peeking out from the outside. It looked kinda creepy since Seokmin looked serious with his brows furrowed as if checking if he was in the right room but as soon as Seokmin sees the familiar faces he smiles widely and opens the door completely.</p><p>"Yah! Dokyeom-ah you scared the shit out of me. Why are you being so creepy sneaking up like that" Mingyu exclaims clutching his shirt in shock. Soonyoung chuckles at them</p><p>"Hey buddy shut up! You're just a scaredy cat" Seokmin teases as he walks inside with a bright smile</p><p>"Wow hyung! You're one to talk" Chan from Soonyoung's right side teased Seokmin back and Soonyoung giggled</p><p>"Well it's not my fault I had to check if we were in the right room since someone made a mistake of going inside someone else's room" Seokmin says turning his gaze on the direction of the door and as if on cue, the man in question answers and defends himself</p><p>"In my defense, Vernon told me to open the door and get inside so I thought it was it. Nobody told me it wasn't that room I should be entering" Wonwoo defends walking inside the room</p><p>Series of whistles and calls of the other’s name were soon heard in their room but Soonyoung could not pay attention much not when he feels his heart thumping loudly in his chest as soon as the deep voice passes through his ears for his mind to register and as if he had been enchanted by a spell, his head automatically turns to the owner of the voice.</p><p>There, right beside Seokmin, Jeon Wonwoo stands in all his gorgeous features. Soonyoung takes in his tall figure which he thought was unfair because how come Wonwoo keeps getting taller and taller when it seemed like his growth hormones stopped affecting him since college. His hair was down and dyed red, tips of his fringes touching the edge of his glasses which hangs on the bridge of his nose.</p><p>'Wow, he still looks as dazzling as ever' Soonyoung thinks but immediately dismisses it. He really has no right to ogle at his ex who probably hates him. A lot.</p><p>Soonyoung continues to stare at him though, it's not like it's a crime to appreciate the beauty of someone, he justifies to himself. Wonwoo was wearing a green turtleneck and blue jeans that seemed cold in Soonyoung's eyes despite the thick black coat wrapped around him.</p><p>Soonyoung can't help but furrow his eyebrows because he knows how sensitive to cold weathers the other was. In fact, he knows Wonwoo's favorite season is summer since he gets cold easily. But then again it's been five years who's to say Wonwoo didn't change in that long period of time when Soonyoung himself have changed so much. Soonyoung smiles bitterly at that thought</p><p>Feeling the intense gaze directed towards him, Wonwoo roams his eyes around to look for it and Soonyoung didn't even have the time to ponder on how it felt like they were in a shitty romance movie where everything around them stops as soon as their eyes met and feels like they were the only two people in that room because his mind automatically shuts down as soon as he meets Wonwoo's eyes. If his heart was thumping really loud and fast before, this time he could feel it stop so abruptly he probably stopped breathing. It was like everything in him stopped working. Were his organs even still there inside him because he felt empty yet full at the same time. However possible that may be. He can't take his eyes off of Wonwoo's. Their eyes were locked onto one another for what seemed to be a long time.</p><p>When his brain finally decided to join him, the first thing it did was flash him the memory of <em>that night</em> and suddenly he could see pain and sadness in Wonwoo's eyes. It was as if he was there, five years ago, leaving Wonwoo behind and breaking his heart in the process. He knew his mind was just fucking with him but it feels too real he can't handle it. Funny how he just wishes for his brain to work properly but here it is doing more than that, reminding him of what he had let go and could never have again.</p><p>He was the first one to break the eye contact. He couldn't stare back at him anymore, not when all he could see was how stupid and foolish he was for breaking his promise, for hurting him. He blinks his eyes rapidly just to dismiss the tears that were starting to form. He can't cry here. He thinks he doesn't deserve to.</p><p>The rest of dinner went by in a blur to Soonyoung. He had never looked anyone directly in the eyes again that night, afraid to give himself away. When Seungcheol, Joshua and Vernon asked him if he was okay that night he just told them he thinks his cold was getting worse and he just needed a comforting and long sleep then he will be okay, offering them a small but assuring smile. It was a Saturday anyway so he had time to wallow in his miserable life tomorrow when no one was watching him. For now, he has to get a grip of himself first. His friends didn't have to worry about his own issues in life.</p><p>Soonyoung was too preoccupied the whole night he didn't notice a pair of eyes that didn't stop looking at him, worriedly, from the moment he had break their eye contact.</p><p>💎💎💎</p><p>"Hyung you're a life savior. Thank you so much. Oh my god! I'll treat you to a fancy Japanese cuisine next weekend I promise" Minghao tells him on the phone while he's having dinner on a Friday night.</p><p>He had a long day at work today since they have a new project to prepare on for the next month and the moment he arrives home he was so close to just leaving everything for a good precious sleep if it wasn't for his stomach rumbling so hard he couldn't ignore it so he rummages his kitchen for something edible to eat. Good thing Seokmin was kind enough to fill his kitchen with groceries earlier this week but he had no energy left to cook dinner and opted for a cup of ramen instead. A nagging voice in his head that sounded a lot like Chan was locked away in the deepest part of his brain. Just for tonight, he was just really really hungry and really really tired.</p><p>He was filling the cup with boiling water when his phone rang from the counter. He carefully reaches for his phone to look at the caller id and slid the screen to answer. It was Myungho.</p><p>"It's no biggie I have no work tomorrow anyway. Are you sure though? You're really trusting me in choosing your wedding cake?" Soonyoung asks before he blows air on his noodles and slurps them in one go</p><p>"Yah! Hyung are you eating ramen for dinner again?" Minghao asks disapprovingly</p><p>"Yesh" Soonyoung answers, his cheeks round and full with ramen</p><p>"Didn't we tell you not to eat too much ramen. It's not healthy" Minghao nags</p><p>Soonyoung chews on his noodles then swallows them before he speaks again</p><p>"This is like my first ramen for the week okay? I've been eating properly I swear" Soonyoung defends himself as he tucks his phone between his ear and shoulder to pour himself a glass of water. He hears Minghao sigh from the other line</p><p>"This is why someone should really be there to take care of you" Minghao mumbles quietly which Soonyoung didn't hear</p><p>"Hmm? What was it?" Soonyoung asks putting down his glass of water</p><p>"Nothing. We already chose some cakes actually you just have to see them and well taste them and yes hyung, I trust you with this. I'd ask Seungkwan instead but the daycare center has a scheduled trip tomorrow and well I don't trust anyone else's tastes" Minghao explains half joking half serious. Soonyoung chuckles.</p><p>"Okay. But if it turns out you don't like my choice either you're not allowed to blame me okay?" Soonyoung warns</p><p>"Yes hyung" Minghao giggles. They talk some more before Soonyoung says he was feeling really sleepy already so he had to go.</p><p>The next day, Soonyoung wakes up at around noon, he was that tired don't judge him. It wasn't a problem anyway since the cake tasting was scheduled at 3pm so he had a lot of time to prepare and didn't have to wake up early.</p><p>He casts a glance on his phone and checks again if he arrives at the right place and when he's sure enough he's at the right place, he taps his phone on the screen beside the driver's seat to pay for his fare before he gets down the taxi, of course not forgetting to thank the old taxi driver and tells him to drive safely.</p><p>He texts Minghao to inform him he just got off the cab before he puts his phone inside his jeans pocket and wipes his hand on them. He had always hated his sweaty palms, everyone does actually Mingyu and Joshua had always complained about it before but there was <em>one</em> <em>person</em> who never had a problem with his sweaty palms though.</p><p>He walks towards the boutique and could see the display cakes. He smiles before he opens the door and the bells on it ring. He goes inside and makes his way to the counter and was immediately greeted by the receptionist's bright smile. He can't help but drool on the amount of sweets displayed in front of him. He wants to eat a piece of cake</p><p>"Good Afternoon, Sir. Welcome to 17 Carat Patisserie. Do you have any appointment for cake tasting or will you be dining in?" The petite girl greets him with a bright smile which successfully breaks his attention from the delicious cakes</p><p>"Uhm yeah actually I have. It's for my friends' wedding. Xu Minghao and Kim Mingyu? They can't come today so they sent me instead" Soonyoung replies politely returning her smile</p><p>"Oh let me check our list Sir, hold on" the girl said as he types in her computer. Soonyoung nods and glances around. There were a few customers eating while some were browsing through magazines of cakes. He heard from Minghao that this shop customizes cake for any occasions and though it was pricey most of their designs were actually good.</p><p>"Excuse me Sir, Can I please have your name?" the girl asks</p><p>"Yeah, it's Kwon Soonyoung" he replies with a smile</p><p>"Okay Sir thank you. This way please. I guess there are two of you who will be tasting the cakes for Mr. Kim and Mr. Xu's stead" the girl explains as he leads him to a table in the corner</p><p>"Wait sorry? Did you say two? I don't think Minghao mentioned anyone who'd be joining me. Did he say he'd come or Mingyu? I thought they were busy" Soonyoung asks the girl, confused.</p><p>He was about to take his phone from his pocket to ask Minghao where he was or Mingyu when he hears someone clears their throat. He was curious since it sounded too deep for the girl he was talking to so he lifts his head and freezes on his spot when he sees Wonwoo in his casual button-up shirt and trousers standing in front of him</p><p>Soonyoung opens his mouth to say something but then closes it not sure what to say and his malfunctioning brain was really not helping, not to mention his pounding heart</p><p>'Jeon Wonwoo and his effects on me. Damn it' Soonyoung thinks before he decided he should talk to stop making a fool of himself</p><p>"M-Myungho didn't tell me you'd be here. I mean he uhm he asked me to since no one was available to do it" he mentally slaps himself for stuttering</p><p>"Mingyu was the one who asked me, he said the same thing" Wonwoo replies nonchalantly</p><p>'Fucking Minghao and Mingyu! Did they fucking plan this because it's not funny' In Soonyoung's mind he was already killing the couple</p><p>He takes a deep breath to calm himself, it's not like he can do something about it. He didn't want to be rude and suddenly leave the place besides that would be really suspicious of him and it'd be the last thing he wants.</p><p>They both sat on the couch, a small awkward space between them, as the girl asks them to wait for the cake samples Mingyu and Myungho have chosen. Soonyoung takes his phone from his pocket and sends Myungho a text.</p><p>Apparently, the guy in question didn't have any idea why Wonwoo was there and swear he didn't plan anything but he did tell Soonyoung he remembers hearing Mingyu talking to Wonwoo last night so that must be it.</p><p>Soonyoung was itching to talk but he's scared to open his mouth and he didn't know what to say either. It was so awkward he wanted to let the ground swallow him so he could disappear. Was this how it feels to have your ex beside you after years? Not to mention they were both in a bakery browsing through different magazines of never-ending wedding cakes.</p><p>'Fucking Mingyu, I will throw that kid in the deepest pit of hell' Soonyoung thinks, murderously</p><p>He was thinking of more ways to murder his friend who had gotten him into this mess when another staff came to their table.</p><p>"Good Afternoon, Gentlemen. Here are our latest cake designs to give you more ideas for your wedding cake. May I ask what theme do you plan to have?" the guy politely asks and Soonyoung's eyes widen at the question</p><p>"No.. uhm we're... ahh we're not really.." Soonyoung trails off panicking</p><p>"Ahh you're not sure yet of your wedding theme? We have a variety of simple cakes that could fit on any theme Sir don't worry. Here we hav--"</p><p>"We are not here for the wedding cake" Soonyoung exclaims blushingly, tone rising defensively.</p><p>"I mean we are but it's for our friends' wedding. The other girl has gotten them already for us I think" He adds clearing his throat and slightly tapped both his cheeks to hide the crimson red color creeping on it.</p><p>"Oh, my apologies Sir. Do you want to order something then while waiting?" the guy says sounding embarrassed and nervous for making a mistake</p><p>"I'd have one piece of red velvet cake and a can of cider. He'd have a piece of chocolate mousse and a can of coke zero" Wonwoo tells the guy instead and Soonyoung looks at him.</p><p>"What?" Wonwoo says turning to him, with his eyebrows slightly raised, when the guy leaves them</p><p>"N-Nothing" Soonyoung says avoiding his gaze which made Wonwoo frown for a sec</p><p>"You probably scared him" Wonwoo adds continuing their conversation. Soonyoung lifts his gaze to look at him again, confused</p><p>"That guy, he's new and you probably scared him" Wonwoo continues in a light tone. He didn't mean any ill about his comment, in fact Wonwoo wanted to tease Soonyoung to lighten up the heavy and awkward atmosphere surrounding them because he hates it but the older just bows his head mumbling an apology before he excuses himself to go to the bathroom.</p><p>Wonwoo sighs and rubs his face frustratingly. This isn't what he had in mind. He's ready to apologize to Soonyoung when he gets back but the older didn't even sit next to him as if avoiding him was the best thing to do. The chef assigned to make Mingyu and Minghao's wedding cake greets them a few minutes after and they start tasting the samples without talking again. Soonyoung engages himself to a long talk with the chef just so he didn't have to be left behind with Wonwoo alone. The younger remains calm and composed despite the growing frustration he feels all throughout the cake tasting appointment.</p><p>Wonwoo had been back in Korea for nearly a month now and he still have two more months before he needs to work at Samsung Medical Center. They have given him three months for vacation and to accustom himself again on how to live in Korea considering he had been away for a long time. He took up his general surgery residency in St. Thomas Hospital in London for five years and was actually offered to continue his specialization in neurosurgery there but he politely declined as he had been wanting to come back home. He had never wanted to leave in the first place anyway. His home was <em>here</em> and it will always be.</p><p>One of the directors of the hospital was a Korean and was very fond of Wonwoo's work as a doctor. He was a very brilliant doctor, as they all praise. So when Dr. Nam heard about his plan to go back to Korea he immediately tells him to apply in Samsung Medical Center, one of the most prestigious hospital in the country, and that the old man would even refer him. Dr. Nam might have had a big influence on the hospital as Wonwoo got accepted so quickly when from what he had heard, it was hard to get accepted there. Dr. Nam himself was a neurosurgeon so he made sure to tell Wonwoo to really continue his specialization there or he'd fly back to Korea just to kick his ass and give him a piece of his mind. Wonwoo considers him as his mentor, he was a really great doctor so to say.</p><p>Wonwoo stands up from his seat as Soonyoung does the same and they both bowed to the chef, Soonyoung keeps on praising the cakes he had tasted since over an hour ago and the chef looks delighted with the compliments. The chef offered them both a handshake before he leaves to attend to another cake tasting appointment.</p><p>"Hoshi-ya" he hears Wonwoo calling him once they were out of the shop. He immediately snaps his head to the other and hummed</p><p>"About earlier, I didn't mean to offend you or anything" Wonwoo says carefully, hands inside his pocket. Soonyoung was surprised to hear Wonwoo apologize so he panics again, Wonwoo did nothing wrong if there was someone at fault, it's Soonyoung and his tendency to be dramatic</p><p>"What? No. You didn't. I... I was stupid. I shouldn't have made it a big deal and you were right I've probably scared that kid. I'm sorry" Soonyoung bows his head again. He didn't want Wonwoo to hate him even more and he knows he had overreacted and it wasn't the worker's fault he misunderstood. It was just Soonyoung reacted too much about it. He should've been cool and just laughed it off instead of stuttering and raising his voice like that.</p><p>Wonwoo looks at Soonyoung who was fiddling with his fingers while looking down on the ground and sighs. This was what Soonyoung always does whenever he was overthinking.</p><p>'Some things just never change huh' Wonwoo thinks mentally shaking his head</p><p>He's about to say something to make Soonyoung feel better when he hears a rumbling sound, which clearly came from Soonyoung's stomach</p><p>Soonyoung widens his eyes before he gulps slightly and cleared his throat. He just had plates of cakes earlier why has his stomach rumbling like a pig. Soonyoung internally groans then he remembers that he didn’t have breakfast or even lunch earlier.</p><p>"Uhm, I should uhm probably go" Soonyoung says avoiding Wonwoo's gaze in embarrassment trying his best to hide his blushing cheeks. Wonwoo wants to laugh but he retains his neutral expression instead, he didn't want Soonyoung to misunderstand him again.</p><p>"Yah, there's a katsu house just down the street, do you want to go eat dinner together?" Wonwoo bravely asks, shrugging his shoulder so it wouldn't be obvious that his nervous Soonyoung might say no</p><p>"I uhmm it's fine you don't really have to..." Soonyoung trails off awkwardly waving his hand to dismiss.</p><p>'See I knew it' Wonwoo mentally rolls his eyes but he wouldn't let Soonyoung have it easy</p><p>"Oh. You're gonna let me eat on my own then?" Wonwoo pouts and it made Soonyoung's heart skip a beat. He can't really resist the urge of looking at Wonwoo when he sounded cute like that.</p><p>'Why the fuck is he acting cute? Wait. No he's not acting cute Soonyoung. Why would he act cute in front of you when you're no one to him now' Soonyoung beats himself internally</p><p>"Come on Hoshi-ya, you know I hate eating alone. Please" Wonwoo insists, and were those sparks Soonyoung sees in Wonwoo's beautiful eyes? Why was he seeing things now?</p><p>Soonyoung didn't have time to reply anymore because the next thing he knew Wonwoo was dragging him down the street. Yes, drag as in Wonwoo's got his hand wrapped around Soonyoung's wrist as he pulls him. Soonyoung's heart kept hammering inside his chest.</p><p>Somewhere along the street, Wonwoo had moved his hand to fully grasp Soonyoung's hand instead of just the older’s wrist and Soonyoung can't take his eyes off of them as it made his heart pound more. It still feels good to be held by Wonwoo like this. If only time would stop at this moment so he could make this last, unfortunately the world hates him so that won't be possible.</p><p>Soonyoung tugs his hand away from Wonwoo using the menu as an excuse and browse through the various Japanese food displayed in front of him. He nearly drools at the sight of them and finds it hard to choose. Wonwoo who had frown when he let go suddenly grins upon seeing the older's eyes sparkling with the sight of food. He watches Soonyoung contemplates on whether to order a bowl of chicken teriyaki or a plate of crispy tonkatsu. Soonyoung was mumbling loud enough for him to hear from across the table.</p><p>Wonwoo remembers how long it'd take Soonyoung to pick his order especially when it comes to Japanese cuisine, he always takes his time. He was reminded of how he'd always end up ordering Soonyoung's other option just to see the other's sparkling eyes. Wonwoo was a picky eater he doesn't eat a lot of things but being Soonyoung's bestfriend for more than half of his life he learned to eat things he never knew he would just for the older.</p><p>"Hoshi-ya" Wonwoo calls after five minutes of Soonyoung still battling himself internally about which set should he order. Soonyoung hums and turns to him with a pout, eyebrows furrowed, Wonwoo feels his breath being knocked away from him and tries his best to conceal a squeal. He coos internally instead and clears his throat.</p><p>"Uhm, how about you take that chicken teriyaki and I'll have tonkatsu" Wonwoo says from across him and Soonyoung seemed to accept the offer getting excited for a moment but then he averted his eyes and closed the menu.</p><p>"No, it's fine. I'm sorry. I'll just have the teriyaki you can order something else" Soonyoung replies shyly</p><p>"But I love tonkatsu and I haven't had any in a while" Wonwoo retorts with a smile before he calls the attention of the waiter</p><p>Was it even possible to be blinded by a single smile? Soonyoung shakes his head to stop the thoughts before he gives himself away again. He reaches for the glass of water in front of him and drinks from it. He hopes the pink tint on his cheeks was not that obvious.</p><p>"So do you still work in the same company?" Wonwoo asks</p><p>"Huh? Oh uhm yeah. I am" Soonyoung answers a bit awkwardly</p><p>"Does Changkyun still works there too?" Wonwoo asks to continue their conversation and toss out the awkwardness</p><p>"Changkyunnie? No he transferred to another company but we still keep in touch, do you want to talk to him? I can give you his number if you want" Soonyoung offers taking his phone out. Wonwoo watches him search for Changkyun's number in his phone with fond eyes.</p><p>"Here. You should give him a call sometimes" Soonyoung lends his phone and looks at Wonwoo across the table when he caught the other staring at him, he fakes a cough and averted his gaze which made Wonwoo smirk a little</p><p>"What about Jooheon-ie hyung? Is he still giving you a hard time at work?" Wonwoo jokingly asks putting down his phone on the table and gives back Soonyoung's</p><p>"Oh no! Don't even mention that bad old man. He was promoted 2 years ago which I celebrated because you know he had been slaving me for years then thinks he could get away with it by treating me to a fancy meal but then just a few months ago I got promoted too and now we're in the same department again and he's being bossy again. I mean he's not my boss anymore..." Soonyoung starts complaining and Wonwoo finds it endearing. Kwon Soonyoung is finally talking to him without getting awkward. He knew this would work, Soonyoung doesn't overthink when he's engaged to a talk he's really interested in.</p><p>Soonyoung continues to talk about things and Wonwoo just listens to him as they eat their dinner. The older didn't even notice how Wonwoo had cut a big piece of his tonkatsu and gave it to him or the fact that he himself gave Wonwoo a portion of his own meal. Wonwoo feels like they were taken back to when they were still together. If only he could hold Soonyoung's hand from across the table or holds his face and kiss his forehead it would be the best night of his life in five years. But he knows he can't do it yet. Not now at least. He didn't want to catch Soonyoung off guard that might scare the other away again.</p><p>Soonyoung sighs in defeat then nods at Wonwoo when the younger was stubborn enough to insist on sending him home. Soonyoung didn't really want to burden Wonwoo or anything realizing that he had probably hold up the younger for far too long because he got too chatty during their dinner telling almost everything that happened to him for the past years that Wonwoo wasn't there. It was like he was talking to Wonwoo, his bestfriend for years not Wonwoo his ex. Which should never happen again because Wonwoo was not his bestfriend anymore and he will never be again he lost that right when he broke his promise to him. He didn't expect that talking to Wonwoo could still be this natural and he got too comfortable with how Wonwoo was curiously shooting him questions forgetting the fact that Wonwoo hates him and was probably just being polite when he probably has more interesting things to do than listen to Soonyoung ramble about well, everything.</p><p>Wonwoo had always been Soonyoung's human diary ever since they became close when they were 10. The younger was the one who had received every single curse Soonyoung directed to anyone who frustrated him or the things he wanted to do, his secrets, anything. Wonwoo knew everything about him and he knew everything about Wonwoo then. Even as they start dating, Wonwoo never stopped being his bestfriend, his confidante and his partner in crime, so to say. There were no secrets between them and they'd always tell each other stuff may it be just a small thing like what Soonyoung had for lunch on that day or something bigger like deciding that he wanted to major in marketing rather than force himself to what his parents want him which was to take law. Every decision that Kwon Soonyoung had made in his life, Jeon Wonwoo was the first one to know... except for <em>that one</em>. They've always been together in everything. Not until Soonyoung broke up with him, left him and told him things he never meant and when Wonwoo flew away to London, Soonyoung lost contact with him well he didn't exactly expect Wonwoo to talk to him after what he had done so they never once had spoken to each other then.</p><p>Soonyoung knows though that even if they still belong to the same group of friends or maybe if Soonyoung is lucky and they become friends again they would never be as close as to what they were before and that really sucks but Soonyoung doesn't have anyone to blame but himself. <em>If only...</em></p><p>"Just right at that corner" Soonyoung says just as Wonwoo pulls up in front of his apartment complex. Wonwoo stops the car and Soonyoung takes his seatbelt off</p><p>"Uhm, thanks for the ride you didn't really have to and for dinner as well. I'm really sorry if I was too loud and held you up for too long I didn't notice, Sorry" Soonyoung says, head down and gaze on his lap where he was fiddling with his fingers again. Wonwoo wants so much to hook his fingers on Soonyoung's chin just so he could lift it up and make the older look at him. He wants to badly cup Soonyoung's face tell him to stop saying sorry every time and kiss the daylights out of him until he's convinced that Wonwoo was far from hating him. But instead he says.</p><p>"I don't mind" Soonyoung snaps his head to Wonwoo's direction and sees him shrug nonchalantly. Wonwoo then smiles at him genuinely, Soonyoung had to internally slap himself for staring too much.</p><p>"O-Okay" Soonyoung stutters before he opens the door and gets out of Wonwoo's car. He closes it again once he's out and was about to take a step when he hears Wonwoo pulls down his car window.</p><p>"Good night, Soonie" Wonwoo mutters and Soonyoung was sure his soul had just left him. He hadn't heard that nickname in a very long while. He wants to cry</p><p>'Fuck my life' Soonyoung thinks, his heart pounds in his chest loudly</p><p>Wonwoo grins at Soonyoung's reaction and chuckles before he closes his window and drives off the complex. He glances at the rear view mirror just before he turns right and caught a glimpse of the still in dazed Soonyoung. His smile widens even more.</p><p>💎💎💎</p><p>"No" Soonyoung says with a frown, eyes directed towards the television. He was watching Titanic on Netflix while munching on a bowl of popcorn</p><p>"Hyuuuuung~" Seokmin whines from the other side of the couch, body fully turned to the older as he hugs his legs to his chest with his chin on his knees. He was pouting.</p><p>"For the nth time Dokyeom-ah. NO" Soonyoung turns to him and glare at him but he averted his gaze right away since Dokyeom looks like he's about to cry</p><p>"But whyyyyyyy~ I thought everything was good between you and Wonwoo hyung. Myungho told me you guys have been talking a lot while you guys have been helping him with the wedding preparations" Seokmin insists as he annoyingly kicks Soonyoung's side with his feet. Soonyoung grips on his feet and tries to tickle it but Seokmin pulls away immediately.</p><p>It was the truth actually since that cake appointment the two of them have been helping Minghao with other wedding preparations. It wasn't just the two of them though, sometimes their other friends would be there as well if they weren't that busy with their works. However, since Wonwoo didn't have to go to his work at the hospital yet, as he is still on his vacation, he would always be there whenever the couple ask him to help them on something and he really doesn't have that much to do so he always agrees. Soonyoung on the other hand is a sucker for wedding preparations. He likes preparing things and helping his friends on choosing what's good or not. Even during Jeonghan and Seungcheol’s wedding or when Vernon and Seungkwan got married as well, he didn't miss a single day in helping them for the preparation even if he was busy at work. He was really a sucker for weddings.</p><p>It is also true that they have been talking a lot with each other and most of the time they just bicker like how they used to before but it wasn't like they were back to being bestfriends again or something, Soonyoung knows it would never happen. Besides they only talk whenever they're together and are helping Mingyu and Minghao out, other than that there was no form of communication between them whatsoever. Soonyoung doesn't even have Wonwoo's number to begin with so he thinks Wonwoo was just talking to him to not make their friends worried or awkward of how things are really between them.</p><p>"Why do I need to go? You said you just need to go with him because he only wants to buy a new bookshelf for his apartment. It's not like both of you will be the one to carry that bookshelf for you to need me to help you because as far as I know those things get delivered on your front door the next day. It's really ridiculous that you want me to tag along" Soonyoung squints his eyes at Seokmin which the other avoided clearing his throat in the process</p><p>"I told you I don't know where to buy bookshelves and Wonwoo hyung just arrived here of course he doesn't know anything. He's been away for five years in case you forgot" Seokmin reasons out, his ears getting red</p><p>"There's this thing we call google you know. You can search for it and just follow the directions wherever it is" Soonyoung replies with a shrug</p><p>"Yeah and then we'll get lost. Hyung, you know how bad I am with directions and please don't even dare try to say to have Wonwoo hyung lead the way because he is far worse than me. Won't you feel guilty if you don't come with us? I mean who knows right? We might suddenly cross the borders and the next thing we know we're both in North Korea" Seokmin half jokes trying to make his point but Soonyoung didn't laugh he just raises his eyebrows at his younger friend. Seokmin sighs for the nth time.</p><p>"Okay fine tell me the real reason why you're so against with this. I thought everything was going well" Seokmin says and it was Soonyoung who averted his gaze this time</p><p>"I have work. I'm tired" Soonyoung replies turning his attention back to the television</p><p>"No you're not. You just told me the other day that you were bored since you just finish a new project and didn't have to work overtime plus you've been sleeping a lot these days other than helping Minghao with the wedding preparations you are always on your bed or here on your couch napping like a lazy cat" Seokmin scolds as he points his finger to the older. Soonyoung turns back his head and tries to bite it but Seokmin's reflex was fast enough. Soonyoung pouts.</p><p>'That was close. Damn it'</p><p>"Just tell me the truth hyung. Does it make you uncomfortable? Being with Wonwoo hyung I mean" Seokmin asks seriously this time, voice laced with slight worry</p><p>"What No! Of course not. I would never..." he trails off with a sigh</p><p>"If anything he might be the one who feels uncomfortable around me, you know" Soonyoung mutters quietly as he fiddles with his hands on his lap</p><p>"I... It's not that I don't want to go with you but have you even ask him if he's okay with it. Me being there. Because I don't think he is" Soonyoung says with a sad smile still eyeing his hands. He feels his heart getting heavy, this is exactly why he doesn't want to talk about this.</p><p>“Actually you know what don't ask him. Knowing Wonwoo he's probably gonna say he's okay with it even if he's not. He's always been like that" Soonyoung adds lifting his head and fakes a chuckle. He stares at the television with a blank look, he wasn't paying attention to it anymore Seokmin really wants to knock his head on the floor or maybe he'd just hit Soonyoung's head instead to knock some sense into him because he was clearly being stupid at the moment.</p><p>"What the hyung! You still think Wonwoo hyung hates you? Really? Are you serious?" Seokmin exclaims unbelievably. He knows Soonyoung was an idiot but this was beyond what he thought. This was pure stupidity.</p><p>"I don't think he hates me" Soonyoung replies voice cracking which made Seokmin straighten his furrowed eyebrows, replacing his annoyance with worry instead</p><p>"I know he hates me, Dokyeom-ah" Soonyoung finally looks at the other with glimmering eyes. Seokmin doesn't know if he wants to laugh or cry. He does know for sure that his hyung is the stupidest human being alive. Still though he can't help that slight tug in his chest seeing the sad expression on his hyung.</p><p>"How are you so sure that he hates you? Did he tell you that? Because the last time I checked if you hate someone you don't exactly talk or get to be in the same room with them. You just simply ignore their existence" Seokmin insists</p><p>"He doesn't have to tell me. I just know it. Why would he not hate me when I've broken every single promise I made to him… When I left him and said things that hurt him… When I've pushed him away and acted like a real jerk and asshole… When I didn't even talk to him for the past five years and just let everything between us fall apart… How could he not hate me? When even I hate myself for everything I've done" Soonyoung tries to reply between sobs as drops of tears fall from his eyes. He promised himself he wouldn't cry because he didn't deserve it but here he is. Well he was good at breaking promises anyway what did he expect.</p><p>Seokmin panics as he hears the continuous sniffling of his hyung. He moves closer so he could hug him and rub his back to calm him down. It doesn't help though since Soonyoung's cries just get louder and Seokmin feels guilty for insisting. He feels his shirt gets wetter and lets his hand rub against Soonyoung's head.</p><p>Seokmin panics even more hearing his hyung's cries and is suddenly reminded of when Soonyoung has broken down nearly two years ago, when he got too drunk after drinking too much at Jihoon's birthday party and was wailing how much he misses Wonwoo, how much he wishes he was there when everything was a mess, when he was mess. It had been the same year that he got too stressed at work and his grandfather whom he was so close to died. He was too exhausted and lonely. It was far more intense than what was happening right now that even Jeonghan cried with him the entire night when he doesn't easily cry. Seokmin of course being a crybaby, had cried with them and it just hurts to see his Soonyoung hyung cry like that. Thankfully, Soonyoung calms down after a few minutes.</p><p>'This was definitely not part of the plan. Wonwoo hyung is gonna kill me' Seokmin thinks, trying to wipe his hyung's tears and snots.</p><p>"Here" Seokmin hands Soonyoung the glass of water he had gotten from the kitchen earlier after the older has finally calm down</p><p>"Thanks" Soonyoung replies with an eye smile and Seokmin finds it really cute so he pinches his cheeks. He prefers this cute and happy Soonyoung way more.</p><p>"Are you feeling better now hyung?" Seokmin asks genuinely and Soonyoung nods cutely</p><p>"I still think you're stupid hyung. Wonwoo hyung doesn't hate you" Seokmin starts as he sits beside Soonyoung again</p><p>"Yah! I'm still older than you, you know. The disrespect I get in my own apartment" Soonyoung jokes lightening up the mood</p><p>"That doesn't change the fact that you're still stupid. You're the only one who thinks Wonwoo hyung hates you. Everyone knows he's still in love with you" Seokmin mumbles the last sentence rolling his eyes, which Soonyoung didn't hear, thankfully. The older was too busy walloping on his self-pity and hatred.</p><p>'That was close' Seokmin and his tongue's tendency to slip, he mentally slaps himself.</p><p>"That's not true. He hates me I just know it. He's just talking to me only because he doesn't want to burden anyone or make things awkward. He hates being questioned about things so he'd rather just go with the flow than deal with people asking him. Besides he's not a jerk to begin with, of course he'd hide the fact that he hates me. That's how he is" Soonyoung answers with a heavy sigh.</p><p>"You know sometimes I wish that he'd just ignore me. Act like I don't exist instead of… instead of talking to me because that way it'll be easier… easier to accept that he would never be mine again you know what I mean” Soonyoung bites his bottom lip</p><p>“I just... I can't help it sometimes… to hope that maybe I still have a chance that <em>we</em> still have a chance but then I'd remember that night I broke up with him and just remind me of how stupid I am for letting him go, that I don't deserve to ask for a second chance because I've hurt him so much" Soonyoung says, a few tears starting to form again but this time he tries to calm himself down.</p><p>"Did I ever tell you that he tried to talk to me after that night… Tried… Tried to do everything he could to get me to listen to him… but all I did was push him away and tell him… tell him I didn't love him anymore, that I wasn't happy with him anymore” Soonyoung chuckles bitterly</p><p>“It was stupid really and I hated how he knew me too well so I had to try harder to make it more… more convincing. I had to… I had to hurt him more so he’d believe it. I don't even remember most of what I told him because they were all lies but you know… I would never… never forget that look in his eyes when he finally gave up and left me without saying a word” Soonyoung huffs</p><p>“It had hurt more watching him walk away from me and I was regretting it the moment I did it but I knew I couldn't be selfish with him" Seokmin was hearing all these the first time</p><p>"That offer he got he didn't tell me about it to be honest. I heard it from his dad. He didn't tell me because he wasn't taking the offer. He wasn't planning to… and it was because of me… because he didn't want to leave me and you know how stupid that was Dokyeom-ah… It was a fucking rare opportunity to receive a scholarship in one of the most prestigious schools in the world yet..." Soonyoung scoffs trailing off biting his bottom lip again.</p><p>"He had always work hard on everything he does. He had always known what he wanted and was ready to do anything for it but… but he was ready to throw them all away just because of me. Just because he didn't want to leave me… Me, Dokyeom-ah and I wasn't even worth it. I didn't know what I wanted in my life that time. I was dragging him down Dokyeom-ah. He could have been way way way up there but he kept looking back because of me" Soonyoung cries looking at Seokmin who was already crying with him</p><p>"I didn't deserve him. Even now I still don't deserve him and I would never want him to regret anything, not for me. Wonwoo deserves so much more than I could possibly give him" Soonyoung concludes, voice laced with so much sadness and bitterness</p><p>They remained cuddled together the whole afternoon. Seokmin just coaxing his hyung until he fell asleep hugging his dongsaeng because Seokmin didn’t have any idea what to say to make him feel better. Seokmin texts Wonwoo about their failed plan trying not to wake Soonyoung up and when the older asks him what happened, Seokmin just sent 10 crying emoji and Wonwoo knows it wasn't a great sign.</p><p>💎💎💎</p><p>For the next few weeks after Soonyoung's little break down, he had tried his best to come up with excuses to Minghao so he wouldn't have to go during the wedding preparations though he would still phone the younger or Mingyu about the progress and try to help as much as he can. He avoided Wonwoo as much as he could and even when Junhui or Jihoon had ask if they could hang out for casual drinks or when Joshua asked him to go shopping with him along with Wonwoo, he refused all hangouts that involved Wonwoo. He knows he was being an ass and some of his friends especially Wonwoo might have figured him out but he needed a time away from the younger to make sure he wouldn't have another break down. He needs to be okay and to accept things as they are and he knows he would not be able to do it if he continuously sees Wonwoo letting himself hope that they could be something more than what they were. His stupid heart has to accept that he and Wonwoo can be as close as friends but not any more than that.</p><p>However, he can't run away from his friends forever especially with Mingyu and Minghao's wedding finally happening the next day. It's a Friday morning and he is checking his luggage for the last time while waiting for Vernon and Seungkwan to call if they are already in front of his apartment complex. The wedding is happening on Saturday afternoon at sunset, Mingyu and Minghao really planned their ultimately romantic wedding very well. Other guests will arrive tomorrow but the two grooms wanted to spend their last day of singlehood with their best friends. A sort of bachelor's party with just the thirteen of them talking and drinking. Hoshi had plan to ditch that out but before he can even utter an excuse Minghao had glared at him said something about not dealing with his and Wonwoo's drama because he doesn't care and what he cares about is seeing their best friends on the night before his most precious day. Soonyoung can't really argue with that so he didn't have a choice and it's not like he has the heart to hurt his dongsaengs.</p><p>The initial plan was him going with Junhui along with Joshua but they were both caught up with work and will be leaving in the afternoon instead. It wasn't much of a problem anyway since the resort where the wedding will be held was just a three-hour drive. Soonyoung was okay waiting for them but Vernon and Seungkwan offered him a ride instead so he doesn't have to wait that long.</p><p>Their three-hour drive to Seokcho was spent with endless bickering and jokes between Seungkwan and Hoshi and Vernon just laughing at their antics. At some point of their conversation Seungkwan and Vernon starts bickering and Soonyoung can't help the grin on his face as he watches his two dongsaengs bicker like an old married couple.</p><p>He remembers those times when the two of them were still mutually pining each other. How Seungkwan had cried because he thought Vernon liked someone else when in fact Vernon had not looked at anyone the way he looks at Seungkwan, even now as they bicker, Vernon's eyes were shining as he looks at his other half as if he was the only man that matters to him. They used to bet on whether who among the two would be brave enough to confess first and lots of them had bet on Seungkwan but contrary to what most of them believed, Vernon was the first one to confess.</p><p>It was iconic how both of them were engaged in a verbal fight and Soonyoung can still remember how both of them have red faces out of frustration then suddenly Vernon blurts out 'I like you, you stupid idiot' and everyone in their table was silent. The following scene was even funnier as Seungkwan confesses he likes the other too and they got all shy which their whole group laughed about for almost an entire month.</p><p>From where he was sitting in the backseat, Soonyoung hears Vernon sigh in defeat, his right hand moving towards where Seungkwan's left hand was and holds it, letting their fingers intertwined with each other before he unconsciously pulls it on his face and kisses it muttering 'Okay, okay' with his gaze still on the road. Soonyoung looks at Seungkwan and see the younger's face was blushing with a fond look in his eyes.</p><p>Soonyoung averted his eyes and instead looked outside the car and glances at the sceneries changing in front of him. He felt like he wasn't supposed to be there, like he was intruding a very intimate scene which he believes he was. He'd be lying if he says that the slight ache in his heart was not because of jealousy. He wishes... <em>If only</em>...</p><p>Three hours seemed to pass by quickly and before he knew it they were already at the resort checking in on their hotel rooms. Minghao and Mingyu have booked half of an entire floor in the hotel including the lone suite on that floor for all of them. The three of them were greeted by the two grooms earlier telling them their room arrangements but they had to go to the nearest market so they could buy everything they need for their little party later. Soonyoung tells them not to forget about the red cups and plastic bags because he knows they all get messy when they're drunk. Aside from the married and to be married couples; Junhui and Joshua will be sharing one room since they'll be arriving together much later than all of them then Jihoon and Wonwoo will room together and finally Dokyeom, Chan and Soonyoung will share the suite which had two bedrooms. He was actually a bit anxious when Mingyu was telling them the room arrangements since he knows his friends love to prank and for a moment he thought, a part of him actually had hoped for it, they'd make him and Wonwoo share a room but thankfully they didn't. It was better that way anyway. The three of them went to their hotel rooms and upon entering the suite, Soonyoung thought he'd see his roommates but the room was empty and as if inviting him, the fluffy and bouncy bed looks very comfortable he can't help but lie down. He must've been sleepy as it wasn't even five minutes but he is already on his way to dream land.</p><p>The first thing Soonyoung notices when he opens his eyes hours later was the dark sky outside. He rubs his eyes and stretches his limbs groaning and yawning like a satisfied bear.</p><p>'That was a really good sleep' he thinks with a smile.</p><p>He sits up and takes his phone from the bedside table where he thankfully puts there earlier before he took his nap. He checks whether anyone had messaged him but aside from his secretary telling him about his meeting on Monday and a promotional text from the burger chain he often eats at and buy take-outs, there was no other messages. He shrugs and puts his phone back on the bedside table yawning again. He then glances at the window and sees the half-moon lighting up the whole resort and sees the waves that the ocean makes. he could almost hear their sound as they hit the shore.</p><p>He smiles contentedly before he was interrupted by a loud tad outside the room. Curios, Soonyoung gets out of the bed and fixes his hair in front of the mirror before he goes outside. He didn't bother to grab his phone no one's gonna text him anyway.</p><p>"Oh, hyung you're awake" Chan greets him raising his head to smile at the older before he turns his attention back to the fallen empty container on the floor.</p><p>Soonyoung glances around the living room where Seungkwan and Jihoon are setting up a karaoke machine at the corner, Jeonghan and Joshua putting black and red balloons on the curtains covering the window and finally Dokyeom and Junhui who are at the mini kitchen storing some beers. while munching on a pack of Cheetos.</p><p>"Sleeping beauty's awake" Jihoon announces with a smirk getting everyone in the room to look at Soonyoung.</p><p>"Shut up, Woozi-ya" Soonyoung rolls his eyes at Jihoon and the other just chuckles at him</p><p>"You did sleep a lot and was out like a dead, Dokyeom nearly cried you know" Junhui says to him and hands him a glass of iced tea when he reaches the kitchen. He downs the glass feeling the thirst finishing all of it.</p><p>"I did not. Chan was panicking and told me you weren't moving so I panicked and called Seungcheol hyung and then everybody was panicking because you were really not moving hyung how could you even sleep like that. I've never seen you sleep like that and I've known you for almost half of my life. You scared me" Dokyeom says with a scolding tone</p><p>"Us actually. You scared all of us. Good thing Wonwoo and Junnie were there" Jeonghan says walking to them</p><p>"Junnie hyung did, Minghao wanted to really make sure you weren't dead even though Wonwoo hyung kept telling everyone that you sometimes sleep like that" Chan says grabbing a pack of corn chips, giving him a knowing look</p><p>"His exact words were 'He's not dead he just really sleeps like that sometimes when he's too tired and stressed out' and then he had this really fond but worried look you know. I don't even know how he pulled that up" Joshua says joining the conversation and Soonyoung feels his cheeks getting red</p><p>"I can't believe he still knows your sleeping habits despite you not seeing each other for five years yet Dokyeom and Jeonghan hyung both nearly cried thinking you were dead when they've been having a sleepover with you most of the time" Jihoon says knowingly</p><p>"Of course Wonwoo hyung would know. They are bestfriends and have been since they were like what 10? They've known each other for more than half of their lives that's like really really really long besides they're soulmates" Chan says determinedly and Soonyoung almost chokes on his own saliva. The others just snickers</p><p>"Did I say something wrong? I thought you guys were working things out to get back together. Wasn't that what you told me Dok--" Chan was not able to finish his question because Seokmin just covered his mouth</p><p>"I thought I was the only one who noticed about it and Mingyu hyung kept telling me stories how you guys have been talking and bickering a lot whenever you both are helping them on the wedding preparations" Seungkwan says curiously</p><p>"Did som--" Joshua didn't finish his question when suddenly a shout from the door was heard</p><p>"Hoshi hyung" Mingyu whines and before Soonyoung knows it, a huge puppy was hugging him</p><p>"C-can't b-breathe Gyu" Soonyoung mutters weakly, he was engaged in a very tight bear hug, by his truly, Kim Mingyu. He surely is a hugger.</p><p>"You scared us earlier you know we really thought you passed out and died or something" Mingyu scolds as the other newcomers come in to their hotel room. Soonyoung could see Wonwoo looking at him from his peripheral view but chooses to ignore it.</p><p>Not long after, their little party started but not before they took a picture of all of them together for memories. After the mini photo op in which Seungkwan, Dokyeom and Soonyoung posed for more than ten pictures, Chan announces he'd sing the first song of the night and dedicated it to his two beloved hyungs that were getting married tomorrow. Everyone was laughing at how Chan tries to impersonate the original singer and Soonyoung nearly falls off the couch smacking Vernon's shoulder beside him. Mingyu opened a bottle of vodka insisting that they should start heavy to get to the fun part faster and tells them not to worry since the suite was soundproofed as per Minghao's request. They all knew how loud they could be when they get drunk and they wouldn't like their neighbors complaining about the noise they'd make.</p><p>"Everyone should get drunk okay? This is a celebration. No one is allowed to be sober" Seungcheol announces with a smirk as he offers a toast to everyone</p><p>Three and half bottles of vodka, three bottles of soju and a few bottles of beer later everyone was already tipsy and drunk. Dokyeom was already acting cuter than normal, Chan was on the side mumbling things incoherently, Jeonghan and Seungcheol eating each other's faces in the kitchen, Joshua was in front of the television reciting an article from the constitution, Vernon looking like a kick puppy as he leans on Seungkwan and rubs his head on his husband’s chest possibly whining about something, Jihoon puking his guts out at the common toilet in the living room with Junhui patting his back to comfort him, Mingyu singing his lungs out while waltzing, more like swaying like the drunk people that they currently are, with Minghao their hands intertwined and foreheads against each other as they exchange their ‘I love Yous’ unbothered by the mess their friends are in, Soonyoung who was kissing the floor and begging the ground to stop shaking because he was dizzy and Wonwoo at his side watching him worriedly and fondly at the same time. Wonwoo only had three bottles of beers since he figured at least one of them should be sober enough in case something happens. Anyway their suite was in a mess and everything was chaotic but they don't care, they're too drunk to care, at least most of them.</p><p>Mingyu and Minghao were the first to leave the room saying that they need their beauty sleep for their big day tomorrow. Mingyu had his arms around Myungho's waist while Myungho's arm is around Mingyu's shoulder to support him, Minghao was a lot more drunk than his fiancé. They were followed by Joshua, Junhui and Jihoon, not able to withstand their sleepiness anymore. It was really a good thing that Myungho thought of getting six rooms in one floor and their rooms were right next to each other. It would be embarassing and a hassle to be seen like this.</p><p>Dokyeom was singing gwiyomi with Chan and they're both acting like five-year-old kids which made Wonwoo smile. He was sitting on the couch and he glances at his wristwatch. It was already 3am and it was just the four of them since Jeonghan had drag Seungcheol to their room about ten minutes ago.</p><p>"Ow" Soonyoung whines and rubs the spot on his head that hit the center table. He was planning to get up because he was feeling thirsty and he wanted to drink a glass of cold water but the table was being mean to him</p><p>Wonwoo immediately crouches on the floor and checks his head. It was a bit red, must've hurt a lot. Soonyoung squints his eyes at him trying to figure who was interrupting him. Once he recognizes it was Wonwoo he smiles brightly and then frowns</p><p>"Wonu-yaaaa" he whines cutely; the sound of the nickname he hadn't heard for years makes Wonwoo's heart pound loudly in his chest. Soonyoung was definitely drunk.</p><p>"Y-Yeah?" he stutters and then clears his throat.</p><p>'Calm the fuck down heart, it's just a nickname' Wonwoo's heart doesn't listen</p><p>"Wonuuu mhy hhead erts. feeling didgi. I wan water" Soonyoung hollers, words swirling. Good thing Wonwoo had mastered Kwon Soonyoung's drunken vocabularies</p><p>"Okay stay here, I'll get your water for you" Wonwoo says before he stands up and walks to the kitchen</p><p>When he gets back to the living room with a glass of water in hand, Soonyoung wasn't there anymore but he could hear a faint sound of kicking or hitting something from the first room. He shakes his head, what exactly is Soonyoung fighting against with.</p><p>Before he goes to the room where he knew Soonyoung was, he strides towards the other room to check if Dokyeom and Chan were still alive and they were, thankfully. He goes inside the room, placing the glass of cold water on the bedside table before he walks towards the closet and got his two dongsaengs two blankets and cover them. He raises up the temperature of the air conditioner just a tad bit to make sure both of them would be sleeping comfortably. He leaves the glass of water inside the room and goes to the kitchen to get two more. He goes inside the other room again and places the second glass of water beside the other one and takes another glance at Dokyeom and Chan before he closes the door and goes to Soonyoung's room.</p><p>The first thing he notices was the lump on the bed fully covered by the fluffy blanket but what caught his attention was the sound of sniffles from under it. Worried, he moves towards the edge of the bed and sat on it, placing the glass of water on the bedside table.</p><p>"Soonie?" he lets the nickname slip off his tongue. He'd been wanting to call Soonyoung that since he had come back</p><p>Soonyoung didn't reply but the sobs and sniffles were getting louder and he was getting more worried so he grabs the blanket and slowly pulls it down to see Soonyoung's face. The sight broke his heart, Soonyoung's eyes were red and puffy, there were snots and saliva everywhere and Soonyoung was heaving hard, shoulders shaking badly</p><p>"Soonie hey, what's wrong?" Wonwoo asks gently, hand automatically wiping Soonyoung's face.</p><p>"Wonu?" Soonyoung sobs rubbing his eyes, trying to check if he was seeing right</p><p>"Yes Soonie, I'm right here. Wha--"</p><p>"Wonuuuu~" Soonyoung sits up abruptly and hugs Wonwoo's torso burying his face in the crook of Wonwoo's neck. Wonwoo was taken aback but he immediately wraps his arms around Soonyoung and rubs his back</p><p>"I'm sorry Wonu. I'm so so so sorry" Soonyoung mutters against Wonwoo's neck and Wonwoo felt a lump on his throat. He could feel his eyes tearing up. He rubs his back more trying to coax the older as he mutters 'it's okay' to every apology Soonyoung makes. He had been wanting to hold Soonyoung like this for ages</p><p>"Please don't leave" Soonyoung mutters in between sobs</p><p>"I won't Soonie. I will never leave you again" Wonwoo replies kissing the crown of Soonyoung's head</p><p>They stayed like that for a while Soonyoung muttering a series of 'I'm Sorrys' and 'Please Don't Leave' over and over again and before Wonwoo knows it, Soonyoung was already sleeping against his chest, face still buried in between his neck and shoulder. He could feel Soonyoung's even breathing which made him smile. He missed this a lot.</p><p>He tries to push Soonyoung away a bit just so he could let him lie on the bed but the older tightens his hold around him, pressing his face harder on Wonwoo's neck. Wonwoo smiles. Soonyoung was really clingy.</p><p>"Soonie, I'm not going anywhere but we can't stay like this or we'll both have a backache tomorrow okay?" Wonwoo gently says kissing Soonyoung's hair before he hovers over him so he could lie on the bed with him.</p><p>After a few minutes of struggling, because Soonyoung was clinging to him like a koala, they were finally settled on the bed, Wonwoo occupying the right side of it with his arm snaking around his waist, Soonyoung's limbs wrapped around him and his head placed on the space just a bit below the younger's shoulder, cheeks pressed against his chest. Wonwoo turns to his side slightly so he can hug the older with his other hand and buries his face on Soonyoung's hair.</p><p>"I love you so much, Soonie and I won't let you run away from me again" Wonwoo whispers firmly, kissing Soonyoung's crown before he closes his eyes and a lone tear escapes his right eye. He's happy.</p><p>💎💎💎</p><p>The next day Wonwoo wakes up feeling hot and he quickly removes the blanket covering him. He tries to reach for Soonyoung on the other side to pull him close and hug him but no matter how far he tries to reach on the bed, he couldn't feel the other so he doesn't have a choice but to open his eyes and truth be told Soonyoung wasn't there. He was alone and he frowns at that</p><p>'Where the hell did he go this time?' he sighs</p><p>He stretches his limbs and rubs his eyes before he decided he should look for Soonyoung inside the suite. When he got out he was quickly welcomed by the scent of, was that kimchi jjigae he was smelling? He crosses the hallway and goes to the kitchen finding Dokyeom who was cooking breakfast but that wasn't important even if he was drooling just by the smell of food his dongsaeng was making</p><p>"Morning, Dokyeom-ah. Have you seen Soonyoung?" Wonwoo asks with a yawn and Dokyeom chuckles at him</p><p>"Afternoon hyung, it's already past twelve" Dokyeom corrects as he pours some soup on a bowl</p><p>"I haven't seen Soonyoung hyung I thought he was still asleep with you" Dokyeom continues, Wonwoo glances at his wristwatch and it was indeed already past noon</p><p>"He wasn't there when I wake up. Maybe he's up early to help Minghao and Mingyu?" Wonwoo asks unsure</p><p>"Well could be, I mean the wedding starts at 5pm everyone must be busy preparing everything. Seungkwanie was here earlier and probably dragged a half asleep Chan with him. I was pretending to sleep so he wouldn't drag me as well" Seokmin chuckles handing Wonwoo a bowl of rice and a bowl of soup. Wonwoo mutters a 'Thank You'</p><p>"So have you talked to him? Please tell me you guys are finally back together. I'm getting exhausted standing between the two of you especially when Hoshi hyung is being maximally stupid and did I mention he was being stupid? Yeah, he's being stupid" Seokmin says dramatically rolling his eyes which made Wonwoo laugh</p><p>"I can't exactly talk to a very drunk Soonyoung because it's most likely that he won't remember much the next day. Do you think he freaked out when he woke up and saw me with him?" Wonwoo asks a bit worried. Dokyeom tries to think about it only to shrug after a few seconds.</p><p>"Honestly Wonwoo hyung, we can never know what he's thinking about at the moment. He's a Gemini and that explains a lot but don't worry hyung. I know you guys are going to work it out" Seokmin replies with an encouraging smile</p><p>"You're right I should talk to him no matter what and I won't let him get back to Seoul until we set things straight between us" Wonwoo replies determinedly and Seokmin smiles brightly, the kind that could replace the sun right then and there.</p><p>"That's the spirit hyung. Go knock some sense on that moron's head" Dokyeom raises his fist and purses his lips mouthing a 'Fighting' Wonwoo laughs heartily.</p><p>Just like what Wonwoo expected, Soonyoung most probably freaked out to see Wonwoo with him on the bed if the way Soonyoung was avoiding to even be in the same space as him like he had some contagious disease is something to go by. Wonwoo sighs for the nth time. He had just finish getting his hair done and is now wearing his black suit when he sees Soonyoung near the catering crew.</p><p>‘God! He looks so beautiful in his black suit’ Wonwoo thinks admiring the older</p><p>He was walking towards him so he can talk to him when Soonyoung catches his eye and had literally run away from him. Wonwoo scratches his head. Soonyoung was really difficult to catch when he's being this stubborn.</p><p>The wedding ceremony started at exactly five in the afternoon. The scenic was beautiful, having Mingyu and Minghao stand up facing each other as they exchange their vows with the sunset and the ocean as their background, it was like a beautiful painting coming into life. Mingyu was crying as he recites his vows and eyes focused only on Minghao like he was his most precious gem. Minghao wasn't crying but he mirrors Mingyu's expression. Bliss, happiness and joy were the only emotions swimming in both of their eyes.</p><p>Wonwoo glances at his friends and most of them were crying including Soonyoung. He badly wants to go on his side so he could hug the other and comfort him, possibly kiss him just to calm him down but he couldn't do that not when Soonyoung chose to stand on the other side of the aisle with Seokmin and Junhui who were the groom's best men when he’s supposed to be on their side of the aisle. Besides he can't really steal the grooms' spotlight by sweeping Soonyoung off of his own feet, figuratively.</p><p>The ceremony ended with Mingyu and Minghao kissing each other as people, their families and friends, whistles and shouts out a series of 'congratulations' and smiles at them proudly.</p><p>Junhui just finished his own best man speech when he notices Soonyoung was gone from his seat and blame it on Wonwoo's instinct being paranoid but he feels like Soonyoung had run away from him again. He stands up from the table and pats Seungcheol's shoulder excusing himself.</p><p>He went to the bathroom and even outside the hall but Soonyoung wasn't there so he goes back inside and walks towards Seokmin's table and grabs Seokmin's elbow to catch his attention</p><p>"Wonwoo hyung, is everything okay?" Seokmin asks</p><p>"Have you seen Soonyoung? I can't find him and it's making me paranoid and panicked" Wonwoo whispers weakly, just enough for Seokmin to hear. He didn't want any of their friends to get worried</p><p>"He was just sitting right there earlier. He left?" Seokmin says pointing at another table where Soonyoung's chair was empty</p><p>"Have you checked the bathroom maybe he just peed or something" Seokmin asks calmly</p><p>"I did. I even checked outside. I was planning to go to your room but I thought I had to ask you if you have seen him first" Wonwoo tells the other</p><p>"I haven't but I think you're right you should probably check in the room. Don't worry the program is about to end anyway and I bet Soonyoung hyung is there" Seokmin assures and Wonwoo nods</p><p>"Tell them not to worry okay? I'll go look for Soonyoung" Wonwoo says finally before he exits the place</p><p>Soonyoung types on his phone as he texts Minghao about some excuse he had come up with while he was on the elevator. He knows he was being rude leaving one of the most important occasion for his friend without saying anything but he was getting suffocated and he just needed to leave. He didn’t want to talk to anyone, especially Wonwoo. He was about to hit send when he hears the door to the bedroom opening. Not expecting anyone to come, most especially not Wonwoo.</p><p>"Really Soonyoung, you're leaving?" Wonwoo's deep huff resonated in the quiet room, he was eyeing Soonyoung's duffel bag on the bed</p><p>"Wonwoo I--" he tries to say</p><p>"Save me the bullshit excuse Soonyoung. We both know I won't believe it anyway" Wonwoo interrupts with an annoyed tone</p><p>"What are you doing here Wonwoo? You're not supposed to be here" Soonyoung tries to control his shaky voice but fails</p><p>"And what am I supposed to do huh? Just watch and let you run away again?" Wonwoo scoffs taking a step forward closer to Soonyoung. It was quiet for a few minutes both of them weighing the atmosphere until Wonwoo speaks again</p><p>"Why... Why is it that whenever... whenever things get hard or complicated for you to deal with, you always... always run away... and leave me?" Wonwoo mumbles the last part quietly but Soonyoung was still able to hear it and those words alone was enough to pierce into his heart</p><p>"This won't be the first time Soonie. This isn't the first time you'll leave me alone just because you think it's for the best" Soonyoung averts his gaze, guilty</p><p>"When you first realized your feelings for me when we were eighteen and you thought I didn't feel the same... when you thought I would never feel the same. What did you do?" Wonwoo asks tone close to begging. Soonyoung didn't answer and instead bit his bottom lip, he could almost hear his heart cracking</p><p>"When my dad told you about the offer I received five years ago and you thought... you thought it was what I wanted and what was best for me. What did you do?" Wonwoo continues, eyes blurring from the forming tears. Soonyoung blinks, gaze still down, and sees a drop of tear slowly falls on the carpeted floor.</p><p>"And now... now you're doing it again" Wonwoo rubs his eyes with his forearm</p><p>"Tell me Soonie, Am I really... Am I really not worth for you to stay?" Wonwoo says in between light sobs after a few seconds. The sound of his sobs alarmed Soonyoung and the older quickly lifts his head to look at Wonwoo. Drops of tears race to fall from the younger's eyes and it hurt Soonyoung even more</p><p>'Fuck' Soonyoung thinks</p><p>"Why is it always so easy for you to leave when I can't even imagine myself without you" Wonwoo whispers weakly</p><p>"You... You promised me Soonie. You told me you would never leave me like what my Mom did. You said we'd always stick together... You promised me I'd always have you. You promised" Wonwoo utters in between sobs. Taking another step closer, they were now standing just a few centimeters away from each other</p><p>"I'm sorry" is what the only thing Soonyoung could say at the moment, ugly tears coming down on his face continuously. He bows his head again feeling ashamed that he could only apologize</p><p>Wonwoo looks at him with his blurry eyes</p><p>"That's not what I want to hear from you Soonie" Wonwoo says, finally closing the gap between them. Wonwoo moves his head to place it over Soonyoung's shoulder, with his eyes closed and nose press against the older's shoulder blades.</p><p>"Please s-stop running away, S-Soonie... Don't leave m-me again... Please" Wonwoo begs and cries against Soonyoung's shoulder. Every sob that Wonwoo makes feels like a knife stabbing Soonyoung. Soonyoung could taste blood on his lips from how hard he bites it.</p><p>"I'm sorry Wonu. I'm really sorry... I can't" Soonyoung sobs and Wonwoo lifts his head to look at him</p><p>"Why the fuck do you keep saying that you can't? You can't what? You can't love me? You can't stay with me? You can't be with me? What? What does that mean?" Wonwoo gruff frustrated</p><p>"I don't d-deserve you Wonu. I'm n-not worth it. There are other peo--" Soonyoung trails off, sobbing</p><p>"Bullshit! Damn it Soonyoung! Do you even hear what you're saying right now? How could you even say that?" Wonwoo yells angrily.</p><p>"But it's the truth! I'm nothing and I've got n-nothing. Even then... Even then I always drag you down with me and... and Wonu you don't deserve that b-because you deserve so much... so much more than I could ever give you. You could've been way way way up there Wonu-ya but I've always pulled you down and hold you b-back. Y-You've... you've already wasted so many years of your life with me and I... I would never let you do that again. You deserve more than this Wonu" Soonyoung cries out shaking his head, his knees giving out on him causing him to sit on the edge of the bed.</p><p>Wonwoo moves and kneels with one leg in front of Soonyoung grabbing the older's hand with his right hand while his left arm was placed on the side of Soonyoung's right thigh supporting his weight. He lifts his head to look at Soonyoung before he pulls the older's hand closer to his mouth to kiss his knuckles. They were both crying sobbing as they look at each other.</p><p>"How could you think like that, Soonie? Why would you… Why would you think that you were dragging me down when you... when you, of all people, were always the first one to push me to do better and... and I've never thought for even a single moment that you were nothing because... because you've always been the greatest thing for me Soonie...I-- I've loved you more than anything and... and I've always chosen to be with you because I want to be with you, always, not because you were holding me back" Wonwoo says in between sobs</p><p>After a few minutes of silence from them with Soonyoung's still heavy sobs and Wonwoo's light sniffles as the only noise in the room; Wonwoo moves his hand, the one which was not holding Soonyoung's, and lifts it to cup Soonyoung's face, dragging his thumb across Soonyoung's cheek to wipe his tears. Wonwoo didn't remove his hand and Soonyoung leans into the touch.</p><p>"Soonie, I wish I could show you what I see every time I look at you because you have no idea how amazing and wonderful you are but I would be more than glad to tell you and remind you of everything that you are to me every single day for the rest of my life if you would just let me" Wonwoo says genuinely and Soonyoung was still sobbing a bit but Wonwoo's hand cupping his cheek makes him feel secured and relax. He closes his eyes and leans into the touch more. He missed being held by Wonwoo like this.</p><p>"Those five years without you by my side was hell for me and I don't want to ever go back to that time again, ever. So please Soonie, please don't leave me again" Wonwoo mumbles desperately, caressing his cheek and as soon as Soonyoung opens his eyes again he sees the hope swimming in Wonwoo's beautiful eyes</p><p>Soonyoung was lost in Wonwoo's eyes and he couldn't find it in his aching heart to deny the younger anymore. He doesn't even know how he had managed to survive the past years without the other but then again, just like Wonwoo, it was hell for him. He was tired of running away from the man he had been, for so many years, and will always be in love with when all he ever wants is to run back to him, kiss him, be with him and stay with him for as long as the younger wants him to. He had been torturing himself and Wonwoo for far too stupid reasons more than enough to last a lifetime and he thinks they both deserved to be happy now and as much as Wonwoo makes him the happiest person alive he knows and understand now that he was all what Wonwoo needs to be happy and he can't deny that anymore just because he doesn't believe in himself.</p><p>"I'm sorry" Soonyoung utters and Wonwoo's expression quickly changed from having hope to disappointment and panicked. Soonyoung almost feels bad because Wonwoo looks like he was having a heart attack but the panicked and alarmed expression that Wonwoo has makes him want to chuckle.</p><p>'He looks cuter like this' Soonyoung coos</p><p>Wonwoo seems to be thinking about ways how to tie Soonyoung up just so the older wouldn't be able to run away from him but before he could do or say something, Soonyoung interrupts him by cupping both of his cheeks, pressing it together to form a slight O.</p><p>"I'm sorry for leaving you before, for not keeping my promise, for hurting you so badly and for so many other things I've done. There are a whole bunch of things I need to apologize about and I still don't understand why you still want--" Wonwoo glares at him</p><p>"Soonie" Wonwoo warns and he looks cuter with his face pressed like this and mouth forming into a pout</p><p>"Alright, okay no more belittling myself" Soonyoung says smiling</p><p>"What I'm trying to say is I'm willing to pay all damages I've made by loving you unconditionally and staying by your side for as long as you want me to" Soonyoung says with the most serious and fondest expression and it made Wonwoo's heart soar. They look at each other with a smile for a while, getting lost in the amount of emotions exploding in both of their eyes. Both of them more than happy to have the other in their arms.</p><p>"Thank you Wonu for not giving up on me, on us" Soonyoung says kissing the tip of Wonwoo's nose after a few minutes of staring</p><p>"For always chasing me whenever I run away without thinking, for being stupid" Soonyoung continues and moves forward, this time kissing both Wonwoo's cheeks</p><p>"And most importantly, thank you for always finding me whenever I get lost and I know I am mostly stupid, probably the most idiotic person alive but I want to be with you for as long as you will allow me to and I will never ever leave you again" Soonyoung adds finally then kisses Wonwoo's forehead with his eyes closed, staying there for a few minutes before he pulls back and opens his eyes giving Wonwoo the sweetest, most tender smile. Wonwoo thinks he's in heaven.</p><p>"Promise?" Wonwoo mutters with a bright smile grabbing Soonyoung's hands and pull them close to his mouth so he could kiss each of the older's palms.</p><p>"Promise. And I will keep it this time" Soonyoung replies, mirroring the same bright expression Wonwoo has</p><p>"Good. Because I don't intend to make it easy for you Soonie. You're indebted to me, forever" Wonwoo says as he slowly moves closer to Soonyoung. Soonyoung feels his heart fluttering and his ears getting red. He can't help but glance at the younger's mouth as he gets too close and Wonwoo noticing Soonyoung's gaze can't help but smirk.</p><p>Soonyoung lifts his gaze to meet Wonwoo's eyes when the younger smirks. He smiles at Wonwoo feeling his heart thumping loudly in his chest</p><p>"I love you, Wonu. Always" Soonyoung whispers cupping the younger's face, more gently this time, then closes his eyes.</p><p>Wonwoo feels his heart was about to explode in delight and he has the brightest smile, cooing internally at the older's cuteness.</p><p>"I love you more, Soonie. Always" Wonwoo mumbles back just before their lips finally touch and he surges forward to finally, after so many years, capture the older's lips in his.</p><p>Soonyoung feels like there are numerous fireworks and other explosives in his chest exploding all at the same time when his lips meet with Wonwoo's. The younger moves his lips against his softly and Soonyoung lets Wonwoo lead the what seemed to be a dance guided by a sweet rhythm only the two of them know. Wonwoo's hands were now on either side of the older's thighs and Soonyoung had his arms hooked around the younger's neck.</p><p>Soonyoung had almost forgotten how exceptionally amazing it feels to be kissed and be held by Wonwoo like this but with just this one kiss he feels again how flawlessly in sync they are and how much they perfectly fit each other. Their kiss was soft, gentle, sweet and beautiful with equal amounts of passion, longing, bliss and love that they've always shared since more than a decade ago.</p><p>Their relationship was far from being perfect and it will never be as perfect as they expect it to be because perfect relationships do not exist, what do exist is the faith that they have for each other, the passion that they share together and the love that they both know will never fade away no matter what.</p><p>And just like any other soulmates, they might come across a bumpy and fuzzy road, possibly losing each other along the way, but they will always, always find their way back to each other again. As what Dokyeom and Chan always say, Jeon Wonwoo and Kwon Soonyoung have always been and will always be like two puzzle pieces made to fit impeccably together, a match made in heaven indeed.</p><p> </p><p>💎💎💎 <em><strong>EPILOGUE</strong></em> 💎💎💎</p><p> </p><p>💎<strong>8 Years Later</strong>💎</p><p>Soonyoung groans at the blaring sound of someone's phone, most probably his, ringing at such an early hour. He glances at the window and sees a glimpse of the still dark sky outside from the little space uncovered by the navy blue curtain.</p><p>'Too early' he thinks as he tries to move and reach for his phone on the bedside table. He can't move that much though.</p><p>"Soonie, don't move too much" Wonwoo, the reason why he can’t move much, mumbles hugging Soonyoung tighter, he was spooning the older with his arms wrapped tightly around Soonyoung, face buried on the sea of Soonyoung's messy hair and chin hooked slightly on the older's shoulder.</p><p>"I'm trying to turn off the alarm Wonu, stop being clingy" Soonyoung replies with a sleepy tone, arm still reaching for his damn noisy phone</p><p>Wonwoo opens an eye and sees how Soonyoung’s tongue was sticking out and was struggling to reach for his phone because he was hugging the older and he grins sleepily at Soonyoung's cuteness before he lifts his body up unhooking his arms from Soonyoung's waist and slightly hovered over the other's form to reach for the phone and turn off the alarm. After he turned the alarm off, Wonwoo opens the first drawer and put Soonyoung's phone there because he knows Soonyoung must've set another alarm for later and he didn't want to be disturbed for the second time.</p><p>Soonyoung had his brows furrowed, not quite impressed of how the younger threw his phone inside the drawer, when Wonwoo glances under him. Wonwoo smiles cheekily before he pecks the tip of the older's nose lightly and lies back down beside the other, hugging him again.</p><p>Wonwoo pulls him closer, if that was even possible, and hugs him tighter pressing light kisses on Soonyoung's neck and shoulder.</p><p>"Yah Jeon Wonwoo! Did you just throw my phone? In front of me?" Soonyoung dramatically says, shaking his shoulder but Wonwoo remained unbothered, instead he littered the older's shoulder with a few light bites dampening slightly the black V-neck shirt he was wearing.</p><p>"Ow!" Soonyoung whines tapping his hand behind to stop Wonwoo from biting him. The younger moves away a bit but not before he places a soft kiss on Soonyoung's shoulder</p><p>"I didn't throw your phone away, Soonie. I just put it inside the drawer because it was too loud" Wonwoo answers with a yawn</p><p>"And what if its screen broke?" Soonyoung asks again, leaning back to Wonwoo's chest</p><p>"I'll buy you a new one" Wonwoo answers immediately, eyes closing, which made Soonyoung scoff</p><p>"Are you showing off your money to me hmmm Jeon Doctor?" Soonyoung says, turning slightly to glance at Wonwoo</p><p>"No. I'm just saying I'm willing to spoil you because I love you" Wonwoo says yawning again, Soonyoung feels a little bad for holding up Wonwoo's sleep when the younger had come home late last night after an emergency 7-hour brain surgery he had to attend to but he missed the other so he wants to tease him.</p><p>"What are you my sugar daddy?" Soonyoung jokes and Wonwoo just made a face</p><p>"You know what I'm going back to sleep, it's too early for my brain to deal with your corny ass. Let me get back to you later when I wake up" Wonwoo turns around, back slightly facing Soonyoung. He could hear the older's hearty laugh from his side and he can't help but shakes his head with a fond smile.</p><p>Not a minute later, he feels Soonyoung's arm on his stomach and snakes around his torso, his legs caging one of Wonwoo's, intertwining them together. Wonwoo playfully kicks Soonyoung's leg and moves away from him.</p><p>"Hey! what was that for?" Soonyoung sulks, moving closer and attaching himself to Wonwoo's side</p><p>"Yaaaaah~" Soonyoung whines when Wonwoo doesn't stop wiggling and keeps moving away from him. Wonwoo chuckles, finally stopping, after he sees the older pouts</p><p>Wonwoo turns his body around and scoops up the older so he could put his arms around, hugging him to his chest. Soonyoung snakes his own two arms around Wonwoo's body to hug him as well. Their legs entangled in a messy loop with each other. Soonyoung presses his face against Wonwoo's sturdy chest and loves how his blue shirt has both the younger's smell and the smell of fabric conditioner. He could bury his face there forever and would never complain because Wonwoo's scent was enough to calm him down at any time and Wonwoo's chest had always been and will always be Soonyoung's <em>eternal home</em>.</p><p>Wonwoo feels Soonyoung pressing his face against his chest so he hugs the other even tighter, Soonyoung loves cuddling so much especially in the morning and he knows his chest was the older's most favorite place, his safe haven. He tucks Soonyoung's head under his chin, the older's hair slightly tickling his nose and inhales the scent of the other as he places a soft tender kiss on top of Soonyoung's head.</p><p>"I love you, Soonie" Wonwoo mumbles reaching for Soonyoung's left hand on his back so he could intertwine it with his. Soonyoung smiles against his chest and lets his husband lock their hands together, wedding bands clanking against each other.</p><p>They both wanted a unique yet simple design for their wedding rings so they had it customized. The design was just a simple silver band with a tiny half-moon and a tiny star, made of tiny diamonds, linked together and their names engraved at the bottom part of each other's ring.</p><p>
   
</p><p>"I love you more, Wonu" Soonyoung's words were muffled by Wonwoo's shirt but the younger hears it clearer than his vision. He presses a long kiss on Wonwoo's chest and feels the younger hug him even tighter, if that was even possible. A few minutes later Soonyoung could feel Wonwoo's even breathing, a sign that the other was already asleep and soon after, he too falls asleep lulled by the soft beating sound that Wonwoo's heart makes.</p><p>The next time Wonwoo awakens the sun was already up and he was alone on the bed. He rubs his eyes glancing around as he sits up and stretches his limbs. He yawns and looks at their digital clock placed on the bedside table. It was already half past eight. He frowns a little when he didn't see his glasses on the bedside table and his instinct was to shout his husband's name loudly</p><p>"Soonieeeee~" Wonwoo calls out loudly and not even ten seconds later, an equally loud scream from outside their bedroom could be heard</p><p>"Second drawer right side" Soonyoung answers and Wonwoo immediately follows. When he sees the case of his glasses he knew Soonyoung had cleaned it for him since his glasses often gets back to its case only when Soonyoung cleans it. Wonwoo either forgets about it and just put his glasses anywhere or is too lazy to put it inside the case.</p><p>Wonwoo yawns again before he fixes their bed then tries his best to fix his wild locks while he brushes his teeth in their bathroom. When he goes out of their bedroom he sees Soonyoung in the living room, standing up by the glass door leading to the balcony, engaged in a call and dressed up formally, he remembers the older told him about meeting a client today though it was a Saturday for a new project.</p><p>He walks towards his husband hugging him from the back and pecks his cheek softly before he rests his head sideways on the older's shoulder. Soonyoung instinctively reach out and pats the younger's head gently</p><p>"Good morning, Soonie" Wonwoo whispers as he clings to Soonyoung</p><p>"Yup, I don't mind... Hmmm... I have three meetings for a new project today but I'm good with lunch... Yup, one at 10, the other two after lunch... Hmmm I think the latest would be around 2pm... Okay... Wonwoo?" Wonwoo listens to Soonyoung's side of the conversation leaning in to the touch of Soonyoung’s hand on his head but then lifts his head with a confused look at the mention of his name</p><p>"He can't he said he has a follow up operation today and I think he needs to check up on that patient who had a major accident last night... I honestly don't remember I think I dozed off when he started explaining about things and got technical... He's used to it and it's not like he didn't know he married someone who gets sleepy at the mere mention of something related to science anyway" Wonwoo laughs wholeheartedly, his cute nose scrunching</p><p>"See? You hear that? He's just laughing at me" Soonyoung rolls his eyes</p><p>"Yah, Seungcheol hyung says hi" Soonyoung nudges Wonwoo who was back at snuggling on Soonyoung's neck</p><p>"Hi hyung" Wonwoo greets excitedly</p><p>"Anyway hyung, I'll see you later. I need to leave. I still need to drive to Yeouido" Soonyoung says and he exchanges a few more words with Seungcheol before he hangs up</p><p>"You're seeing Seungcheol hyung?" Wonwoo asks letting Soonyoung turn around inside his arms so they could face each other and his arms automatically goes around the older’s waist. Soonyoung gives him a full kiss hooking his arms around the younger's neck and pulls away a bit after.</p><p>"Nope just his staff, a training sort of thing" Soonyoung replies with a smile, hand brushing against the back of Wonwoo's neck. Wonwoo nods.</p><p>"I cooked kimchi fried rice earlier you can eat that before going to work. Will you be staying at the hospital for long?" Soonyoung asks now playing with the tip of Wonwoo's ear</p><p>"Nope, I'll be home for dinner. I think I'll be home before you which reminds me what do you want to eat for dinner?" Wonwoo asks and Soonyoung giggles</p><p>"Wonu, no. Everyone knows both of us can't cook shit" Wonwoo pouts and Soonyoung kisses him which made the younger pout more, asking for another kiss</p><p>"But we both love our version of kimchi fried rice" Wonwoo says making a point. Soonyoung kisses him again just because he can</p><p>"Yes, but I don't want another kimchi fried rice for dinner later just order takeout okay or should I?" Soonyoung asks raising his eyebrow and Wonwoo moves his face closer</p><p>"I'll do it. Does pizza sound good to you?" Wonwoo whispers in Soonyoung's ear, kissing the older's temple.</p><p>"Perfect. I want burger and fries too though. Get me one of each with a lot of cheese okay?" Soonyoung answers dropping his arms to rub Wonwoo's back gently and the younger hums</p><p>They remained like that for a few minutes, just hugging each other and smiling before Soonyoung realizes the time.</p><p>"Okay you big baby, enough snuggling. I'm gonna be late for my meeting" Soonyoung says, reluctantly moving away. Wonwoo had a cute pout and is blinking his eyes adorably. Soonyoung chuckles kissing his cheek</p><p>"Don't look at me like that. Why are you so clingy?" Soonyoung boops Wonwoo's nose</p><p>"I'm always clingy but only to you" Wonwoo replies wriggling his eyebrows</p><p>"Okay Mr. Cheese ball" Soonyoung rolls his eyes, cheeks pink. Years being together yet he still blushes like a high school girl at Wonwoo's little antics like this</p><p>"Wonu, I really need to go" Soonyoung says again when Wonwoo doesn't let him go. Wonwoo huffs.</p><p>"Fine" Wonwoo sulkily let goes and Soonyoung giggles walking towards the couch where his things were</p><p>"I miss you already" Wonwoo adds as he sits on the couch and watches Soonyoung arrange his things with a pout</p><p>"You're so dramatic. I'll text you later and don't forget my burger" Soonyoung utters leaning over Wonwoo on the couch to kiss Wonwoo's forehead when the younger pulls him by the arm slightly and surges his head forward so his lips meet Soonyoung's instead. Soonyoung almost squeals but he didn't have time for it when Wonwoo was already kissing him. He moves his other arm on Wonwoo's shoulder to support his weight while the younger holds his other hand.</p><p>"I love you, Soonie" Wonwoo says with a smirk once they separated. Soonyoung glares at Wonwoo with his forehead resting on the other's</p><p>"I hate you" Soonyoung moves away and Wonwoo laughs</p><p>The older then gets his things and walks towards the door but turns around when Wonwoo follows him.</p><p>"No. Stay there, knowing your annoying clingy ass I will never get to leave for work" Soonyoung glares and Wonwoo looked like an abandoned kitten. Soonyoung sighs before he strides back in front of Wonwoo</p><p>"And they say I'm the most dramatic one in this relationship" Soonyoung rolls his eyes he leans in and gives Wonwoo a soft peck on the lips</p><p>"Let me just get this deal today and then I'm all yours until tomorrow, okay Wonu?" Soonyoung offers sweetly which instantly makes Wonwoo nod and smile like an idiot. Soonyoung shakes his head</p><p>"I gotta go. Text me when you get to the hospital and drive safely later okay? Good luck on your operation today. I love you, Wonu" Soonyoung says and reaches up to kiss the tip of Wonwoo's nose before he turns around and goes to the door</p><p>"Drive safely, Soonie. I'll text you later, don't go around and do stupid things okay?" Wonwoo jokes which Soonyoung replied with a glare as he puts on his shoes. Wonwoo chuckles.</p><p>Wonwoo sighs contentedly smiling fondly as he looks up at their ceiling and thinks about how ridiculous he and Soonyoung probably look from other people's point of view bickering about the tiniest things but for both of them, being ridiculous together has always been part of their routine and they will never get tired of it.</p><p>Five years of being married to Soonyoung and nothing much had really change between them that Wonwoo can point out unless of course falling deeper and deeper in love with Soonyoung everyday counts. He wasn't trying to be sappy or being dramatic as Soonyoung would tease him, it's just the truth. Wonwoo doesn't even know how it is possible to fall for someone as much as he keeps falling for Soonyoung but the older makes everything worth it. As unpredictable as he could be, Soonyoung being a Gemini, Wonwoo has loved every part of Soonyoung since a long time ago and as they grow old together, there are still a few things he keeps discovering about Soonyoung but none of them had or will ever make him stop loving the older because Wonwoo knows for a fact that he was born to be with the older and love him unconditionally. He would never exchange anything for what he has right now especially when he has Soonyoung as the last person he sees before he falls asleep and welcomes a new day everyday with Soonyoung safely locked in his arms. Soonyoung is and will always be <em>his home</em>.</p><p> </p><p>💎<span class="u"><em><strong>BONUS</strong></em></span>💎</p><p>Wonwoo rolls his eyes as he watches his boyfriend setup the mini karaoke the other bought in an online shopping app.</p><p>"Soonie, how many times do I have to tell you not to buy useless stuff online. We already have that gigantic karaoke machine you bought a few months ago abandoned and unused in the storage room. Remind me to give Dokyeom a piece of my mind when we see him, he's been passing onto you his tendency to buy things impulsively" Wonwoo shakes his head, standing up to help Soonyoung connect the wires.</p><p>"But Wonu, this is very convenient. I can sing anytime I want with this I mean it's a lot smaller than the other one and besides I got this on sale. Thank God, Dokyeom has a lot of coupons" Soonyoung says proudly and sits on the couch, letting Wonwoo set it up instead. Wonwoo shakes his head</p><p>The next two hours were spent with Soonyoung singing Shinee songs that had been his favorite since he was in middle school and Wonwoo watches him with both an annoyed and fond expression on his face. He loves Soonyoung very much and that includes his randomness and ridiculousness but that doesn't mean he doesn't feel embarassed of what his boyfriend does sometimes.</p><p>"Aren't you tired yet, Soonie?" Wonwoo asks hugging Soonyoung's waist who was sitting beside him on the couch and is busy browsing on the song book</p><p>"Shhh. Shut up I'm looking for a song" Soonyoung says shoving his hand on Wonwoo's face to move it away from his neck. Wonwoo was trying to kiss his neck sneakily.</p><p>"Bingo!" Soonyoung exclaims excitedly, removing Wonwoo's hand around him so he can stand up and type in the number for his next song oblivious of the sulky expression that Wonwoo has from being ignored.</p><p>Soonyoung gets the water bottle which has acted as his microphone for the entire night he had been singing. Unfortunately, the mini karaoke thingy didn't have a mic and their other karaoke machine's mic was sadly not compatible with it. Wonwoo was glad about that actually since he didn't want the neighbors complaining on them. Soonyoung tends to be loud when he sings, getting overly hyped most of the time like he owns the whole space and is having the time of his life at a concert.</p><p>"What the? Really, Soonie?" Wonwoo chuckles when the intro of the song plays</p><p>"Shut up! I love this song. Nest should've been song of the year or something. This is my jam" Soonyoung says excitedly and Wonwoo shakes his head</p><p>"It's a trot song. Okay?" Wonwoo insists as if that alone should explain everything</p><p>"And your point is? Trot songs are the best and we don't tolerate trot hatred in this household Jeon Wonwoo" Soonyoung glares at him before he turns back his attention to his song</p><p>Soonyoung started singing and he sings it with so much passion Wonwoo just laughed out loud feeling like his lungs will give out any time. Soonyoung was singing the bridge part of the song when Wonwoo finally calms down and as he looks back at Soonyoung who was still singing passionately with his eyes closed, he feels something unexplainable in his chest. It was like a whole garden of butterflies start flying around his chest and stomach that makes his insides flutter and all he could see was Soonyoung.</p><p>He watches Soonyoung bangs his head like an idiot with the fondest most tenderhearted expression and his heart soars in contentment. He could really spend the rest of his life just watching Soonyoung doing the craziest things like this and never get tired of it. He feels himself melting and he couldn't take it anymore he wants Soonyoung as close as he could possibly have, so he reaches for the hem of Soonyoung's black jacket sleeve and pulls the other to make him sit on his lap.</p><p>"What the Won--" Soonyoung trails off seeing the expression on Wonwoo's face</p><p>"What?" Soonyoung asks instead, tone changing from annoyed to shy. Wonwoo's piercing gaze makes him feel giddy and embarassed. Wonwoo hugs his waist pulling him even closer and Soonyoung wraps his arms around Wonwoo's neck, his feet on the ground both on one side of Wonwoo's leg and his side pressed against Wonwoo's chest.</p><p>"Have I ever told you how much I love you?" Wonwoo mumbles tenderly which makes Soonyoung blush. The intensity and seriousness of Wonwoo's words not to mention his fond gaze directed to Soonyoung makes the older's heart backflip.</p><p>"Yes, you tell me about it every day, you sappy cheese ball. What's gotten into you? Was my trot song really that good" Soonyoung teases with a wriggling eyebrows, trying to mask his shyness but he knows Wonwoo sees through him anyway. Soonyoung pokes Wonwoo's cheek teasingly</p><p>"Then have I ever told you how much I want to spend the rest of my life with you and that my life would mean nothing without you?" Wonwoo asks sincerely and Soonyoung stops poking the younger's cheek, surprise of the question.</p><p>'Fuck! This isn't it right?' Soonyoung thinks, suddenly nervous</p><p>"What the! What are you on about? Are you proposing or something?" Soonyoung chuckles nervously a few seconds later</p><p>"And if I say I am?" Wonwoo asks teasingly with a smirk and Soonyoung wants to badly wiped it off of his face</p><p>"Shut up! You don't even have a ring stupid, stop joking around" Soonyoung grumbles not liking the joke because now he's expecting something but Wonwoo's smirk just gets wider</p><p>"Are you sure?" Wonwoo asks taking something from his pocket without breaking their eye contact</p><p>Wonwoo opens his palm and a small simple black velvet box appears. Soonyoung's vision starts getting blurry from the forming tears in his eyes</p><p>"When did you even plan this idiot? I hate you" Soonyoung asks sniffling and hits Wonwoo on his chest. Wonwoo's eyes were turning glassy as well</p><p>"Honestly Soonie, I haven't planned anything yet. I was still talking to Seungcheol hyung the other day on how I could propose to you. I did buy this ring a couple of weeks ago because I've been wanting to ask you but I couldn't find the right timing and then you just had to be so adorably crazy tonight that I can't help it but ask even though I didn’t plan it" Wonwoo explains and he panics a little seeing that Soonyoung was sobbing heavily now</p><p>"Soonie hey, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have spring that on you out of the blue. I should've planned for it first. You don't have to answer right now. I'll propose to you properly so please don't cry" Wonwoo adds wiping off the tears on Soonyoung's eyes with his other hand but Soonyoung just shakes his head and sobs</p><p>"I'm not crying because you didn't plan it idiot. I'm crying because I'm really happy. I don't care when or where you'll ask me, the answer would always be the same anyway. But you have to ask me the question first" Soonyoung replies and Wonwoo chuckles, feeling at ease now.</p><p>"Ask you what question?" the younger teases which earns him a hit on the chest from Soonyoung</p><p>"I'm kidding" Wonwoo cups both Soonyoung's cheeks and kisses him tenderly</p><p>When they separate, Wonwoo still had his forehead resting on Soonyoung's and their noses were touching,</p><p>"Remember when we were kids and you told me that the next time we exchange rings they should be real not made of plastic and should have our names engraved on it so everybody would know that both of us were a package deal, can't have one without the other and then I promised you that I'll give you the most expensive ring just to shut you up?" Wonwoo asks gently rubbing his nose against Soonyoung's and the older just nods with a chuckle</p><p>"I'm fulfilling that promise now and I'm making another one" Wonwoo says, as a few tears start escaping from his own eyes. Soonyoung opens his eyes and stares deeply into Wonwoo's. Wonwoo places his hand around Soonyoung's waist</p><p>"Soonie, I've spent more than half of my life with you yet it doesn't feel enough for me because as cheesy as it sounds, I really do want to be with you always. I want you to be the first person I see when I wake up every single day and be the last person I see before I go to sleep every night" Soonyoung was wailing and Wonwoo moves back a bit smiling affectionately</p><p>"I want us to be together until both our hair becomes white and our knees give out but even then I'm still willing to carry you anywhere you wanna go as long as I get to be with you" Wonwoo promises and Soonyoung was biting his bottom lip to stop himself from sobbing more. He was a crying mess. Who wouldn't when the love of his life was looking at him endearingly as if he was the only one that matters to him.</p><p>"I wasn't lying when I told you that my life wouldn't mean anything without you in it and that I want to spend the rest of my life loving you and being with you. So Kwon Soonyoung, my Soonie will you allow me to grow old with you and love you for as long as I possibly can? Will you marry me Soonie?" Wonwoo finishes his speech with <em>the question</em> getting the ring out of the box and holds it out to Soonyoung</p><p>"I told you I don't need anything. My answer would always be the same Wonu. You didn't have to make that cheesy speech to get me to say yes" Soonyoung sniffles hitting Wonwoo and the younger pouts</p><p>"But I didn't say all that just to get you to say yes" Wonwoo defends</p><p>"I know. I'm just kidding. I just.... I don't know what to say you big sap. I hate you” Soonyoung says and hits Wonwoo again, he was in fucking delight and feeling blissful</p><p>“But I really want to spend the rest of my life with you too Wonu. Always" Soonyoung answers pulling Wonwoo closer to him</p><p>"So is that a yes?" Wonwoo teases. Soonyoung rolls his eyes and pushes his hand to Wonwoo</p><p>"In every language. Yes, I'd be honored to marry you Wonu. In this lifetime and in the next it will always be you" Soonyoung pledges as Wonwoo slips the ring on the older's left ring finger. Wonwoo lifts his gaze once he had slipped it on and was immediately met by Soonyoung's lips. They kiss tenderly and sweetly, lips dancing against each other in a slow song.</p><p>They have ended yet another chapter in their life together and was about to start another one, still together. They both know this new beginning will also have its rough patch but with their endless love along with their trust for one another and as long as they have each other, they know they can overcome anything. The promises that they've made and the vows they're about to make, they will live by with them, together. Like always.</p><p>"I love you so much, Wonu. Always" Soonyoung mumbles against Wonwoo's lips</p><p>"And I love you more Soonie. Always" Wonwoo mumbles back before he closes the gap between them and kisses the other again.</p><p> </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>So if you have reach at this point I just wanna say thank you for your patience lol, I hope you liked this and had fun reading it as much as I did when I was writing it. Feel free to tell me anything on the comment section or yall can hit me up on twitter @horanghaewonuya I don't bite hehe &lt;3</p></blockquote></div></div>
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